Realistic or Modern The Pursuit of Happiness (Noctys)

[PunkPrince]

Did he love her?

No, of course he didn’t. None of them did. But a girl could dream, couldn’t she? The people she saw liked her because she made them feel good about themselves. Not all of them wanted sex, either. She had one or two regulars who just…wanted to sit and talk with her for an hour. They were lonely. Pepper was lonely. It worked. And the ones that wanted more from her, she couldn’t complain about most of them either. Some of them were awful—they were rough with her—but the ones who kept coming back were…respectful of her, at least? She was good at what she did, and in some weird way, she supposed they needed her. Or at least she pretended they did. And often, for an hour, she pretended they loved her too.

Pepper had people that loved her. Eva loved her. Kennedy loved her. Jupiter, Hugo, and Ronan loved her. Everyone else at the bar loved her. They were her friends. But did they need her? Pepper wondered this often. Could she vanish and have them be no worse off without her? Would they look for her, if she stopped showing up? These thoughts and more flooded her tiny head as she slipped from the front door of the hotel. Ah, the joys of trauma.

Still a touch buzzed from the wine she’d had earlier in the evening, Pepper started up the street and back towards her apartment, pulling her white fur coat tighter around her slender form. It was only slightly too big for her, but she often felt like she could disappear into it. Sometimes she wanted to. Pepper shivered as a gust of icy wind hit her face, and she quickened her gait, high heels clicking against the asphalt.

“Fuck, it’s colder than a witch’s tit out here!”

She shouted this to no one in particular. A pointless quip shot into the void. She leapt forward, still thinking a bit stupidly from her alcoholic binge, and let out a startled yelp as she slid on a patch of ice. Pepper grabbed the nearest pole to steady herself, and then straightened up and began rummaging through her purse.

She produced and lit a cigarette, taking a long, slow drag as shecontinued on her way home. She reached the building and sat down on the back steps to finish her cigarette before tossing it away and running a hand through her tangled hair. She was exhausted. She would likely sleep in late tomorrow.

Slowly, Pepper pulled herself to her feet and ascended the staircase. She rested her pounding forehead in her palm and slipped quietly in through her back door. She elected to leave most of the lights off, only turning on the small light above her kitchen sink. Pepper tossed her bag aside and headed towards her bedroom. She shouldn’t sleep in her makeup, but at this point she was far too tired to care. Pepper reached the doorway—

And froze.

There was someone in her bed. A person-sized lump was buried beneath the blankets, and Pepper could only stare in petrified astonishment. Had a client followed her home and broken in? She took an anxious step back and slowly leaned down, her eyes never leaving the shape in her bed. She unsheathed the small knife from the holster on her leg and gripped it tightly. She stared at her bed for several more minutes before straightening up. Gaze still fixed on her bed, Pepper took a deep breath in, and dropping her voice several octaves, let out a sharp, “Hey!”

 

[Noctys]

Sofia couldn't help feeling like she had turned practically invisible. Whenever someone passed by her on the streets, they would invariably at most spare her a glance, usually revealing disgust or pity, before continuing on their way. In the end, it was probably better that way, despite how lonely and worthless it often made her feel. She would rather keep having to wander around aimlessly than have some authority brought down upon her, and be dragged back into the uncaring system. She would never be able to fit anywhere, now even more than before, so she would just end up being shunted from place to place at breakneck speed again.

Cold wind constantly slammed into her face, arms, and legs, as well as seeping into the rest of her body through the tears in her clothes. Her stomach pained from sitting empty for quite a while. She needed to get somewhere inside, to rest with at least some degree of comfort, before she was able to keep going again. As she had no money and was quite disheveled, she would never get to stay in any decent place of business for long before being turned away, sometimes quite roughly. Which meant having to break in, something that was hard to do when most of the houses and buildings around had rather high walls or fences she could never hope to be able to climb.

Her luck seemed to turn around after laboriously walking past a couple more blocks, spotting a building that appeared vulnerable enough. Slipping into an alleyway, she then circled until thankfully coming up to a working fire escape railing. She slowly climbed up the stairs until she reached the next floor. She carefully slipped into a nearby ledge, proceeding to hug her body to the wall. Finally, she cautiously stepped sideways until she came up to a window she was able to open and climb inside.


Once inside, she felt seriously tempted to go through the kitchen and find something to eat, but that need warred with her tiredness. In the end, the prospect of sleep won out. She knew it was quite risky, but hopefully, it would still take a few hours until any owners came back. Sofia craved most of all at the moment the chance to just black out for even just a short while. To able to escape, at least consciously, all the bad memories that endlessly haunted her, especially that of the way her mother had looked at her, without any recognition and with transparent disgust, before leaving her alone in that bus station ...

Upon finding a bed, she pulled the covers back and climbed in, keeping her shoes, in case she had to break for them. She slipped her backpack out and clutched it for dear life against her chest, making sure to hold it tightly to one of the straps. Sofia deeply longed for a chance to finally take Bea out again, to hold her beloved companion in her arms and draw comfort from her, but she could easily tell it would be unwise. If things turned for the worse and she had to make a quick escape, the small rabbit would be all too easy to lose in the process. Bea was all that Sofia had left. She couldn't bear to think of having her taken too.

After a few minutes, she finally managed to fall asleep.

Sofia woke up with a startle, bolting upright. Her gaze quickly found its way to the knife that was held by the person in front of her, eyes widening in sheer terror. She let out a sharp gasp, her heart beginning to race and her body going rigid with fear. She pushed the sheets away, keeping hold of her backpack, then rolled towards the opposite side of the bed. Slipping out, Sofia then broke into a run, trying to get to an exit. However, she didn't get very far at all before her weak legs and well-worn shoes caused her to stumble, falling hard on the floor.

 

[PunkPrince]

The shape in her bed quickly bolted upright, and Pepper took a startled step backwards as it scrambled up and ran from the room, heading for the door before it crumbled to the ground. Pepper had to stare for several moments to comprehend the scene before her. This was no client, nor any other threat come to hurt her. It was just a kid!

There was a child in her house. Why the fuck was there a child in her house? Swaying slightly under a wave of dizziness, Pepper quickly put he knife down and rushed over to the girl, who was now collapsed on the hard floor. Pepper knelt down beside her. "I'm sorry!" she apologized quickly. "I thought you were...someone else. I'm not going to hurt you." Pepper paused, wetting her lips before continuing, uncertain of how exactly to approach asking anything else. "Where did you--I mean how did you--why are you in my apartment?"

Pepper knew nothing about kids. Not ones this young, anyway. The girl was undersized and clearly malnourished, obviously much younger than anyone Pepper had regular contact with. Hugo and Ronan were fifteen, but that was about the youngest Pepper ever spoke to. And they were all used to her by now. They knew her well. This kid was a stranger, and she hadn't exactly picked the best place to come to. Eva and Kennedy's house would've been better. At least they knew how to talk to kids. And all their kids had come to them looking just as battered as this girl did. Pepper had only ever had to look after herself.

Her legs beginning to ache from crouching, Pepper sat cross legged on the floor next to the girl. Her gaze travelled over the child's battered form and she wordlessly noted the worn clothes and dirty backpack the girl carried. Where had she come from? Had she run away from home? It would explain her appearance. Pepper pressed a hand to her forehead. The room spun slightly, no doubt an effect from the alcohol she had consumed earlier in the evening. She hadn't expected to come home to this. She wouldn't have drank so much if she had.

But what was done was done, and there wasn't much she could do about it now. Pepper let out a long sigh before speaking again. "You okay, pipsqueak?" she asked, shrugging her coat off onto the floor as she spoke. "Do you...need a doctor, or something?" She paused before adding, "Or like, food?" Pepper was definitely not a doctor, but she had food. Not much, as she tended to mostly eat in scattered handfuls, but she had leftover pizza in the fridge and half a pint of ice cream in the freezer, among the other things scattered throughout her kitchen.

 

[Noctys]

Sofia had managed to keep her head from hitting the floor as well, but just about everywhere else hurt from the impact. She could hardly hope to be able to escape now. Upon the sound of approaching footsteps, the young girl scrambled to try to get up. Not without considerable effort, she managed to rest on her knees. She attempted to stand up, but it was no use at least for now.

By then the woman had reached her. Practically frozen in place, Sofia watched her with weary eyes, her body trembling terribly from both coldness and fright. Then, quite unexpectedly, the woman knelt next to her, apologized, and promised not to hurt her. The knife seemed to have been put away, at the very least ...

At the rapidly asked question, something that she had already known, deep inside, even as she made the decision that had led her here, was brought to the front of her mind. What she had done was wrong. Sure, it wasn't like she was going anything other than maybe food, but she was pretty certain that entering somewhere uninvited like this was a crime by itself. Plus, with how dirty she was and how bad she presumably smelled by now, she had to have seriously messed up the bed ...

As such, filled with guilt, she felt compelled to confess, "I ... I-I'm sorry ... I k-know I s-shouldn't ..." her voice coming out raspy and barely above a whisper. It was the first time she had spoken to someone in several weeks. "I-It's just t-that ... It was c-cold and ... I needed to r-rest ..."


Sofia reached for her bag, which had fallen beside her, proceeding to hug it close once again. She visibly tensed even more upon being asked if she wanted to see a doctor. She couldn't let that happen. She would inevitably end up being reported and taken into care again. The other offer, however, was too tempting to pass up and just might buy her some time as well. "Food w-would be n-nice" she then replied. She hoped against hope that, after she had gotten it, she could somehow be able to convince the woman to let her leave without calling any sort of services.

 

[PunkPrince]

Pepper immediately felt terrible when the girl began to apologize, saying that she was just cold and tired. Pepper knew what that was like. "Hey," Pepper started. "It's all right. I'm not mad. You just...startled me. I thought you were a stranger waiting to choke me out for a minute. I didn't mean to scare you. It's a reflex at this point."

The girl tensed visibly when Pepper suggested a doctor. Was she hurt, or just exhausted? "All right," she murmured. "No doctors then." The child had managed to pull herself onto her knees, but that was all. Pepper was unsure if she could stand. "Here," she said, leaning down to pick the girl up. She was light. Ridiculously so. Pepper gently set the child down on the couch, her visitor quietly accepting her offer of food as she did.

Pepper nodded, slowly standing before heading over to the fridge. "Are you hurt? I have leftover pizza if you want it," she offered, rummaging through the sparse contents of the refrigerator. "I haven't been to the store in a while." She pulled the pizza box out of the fridge and portioned a few slices onto a plate before sliding it across the counter towards the frightened child. "I can warm it up if you want," Pepper offered. "It's cold. I have strawberry ice cream in the freezer if you want the rest of it." She produced the half empty pint from the freezer and rolled it across the countertop. Truly the epitome of nutrition. She had wine in the fridge too, but even she wasn't stupid enough to offer it.

Pepper pulled two glasses from a cabinet above the stove and filled both with water. She handed the first to the girl, taking the food she had set at the counter and passing it to the child. She then perched on the edge of the couch beside the girl before taking a long, slow sip from her own glass. Maybe it'd sober her up faster. She turned slowly and looked at the child closely for a moment before speaking again. "My name is Pepper," she said. "You mind telling me exactly what you're doing here? Apart from resting, I mean. Shouldn't you be at home where you belong?"

 

[Noctys]

The woman told Sofia that she wasn't mad, saying she had just gotten scared. The girl was disturbed by the mention of strangling, flinching at the terrifying thought. She got the point of it though. She supposed the last thing anyone would expect upon finding that someone had broken into their home would be that it was a child who just wanted to sleep.

Sofia relaxed slightly once the woman decided not to take her to a doctor. She didn't seem angry, so just maybe she wouldn't call the police either. By now the way she and things had had to been quite noticed, however, so that still left the threat of social services hanging over her head.

It came as quite a shock when she was picked up. Still clinging to her backpack, she went stiff but didn't otherwise try to resist. Sofia just plain wasn't used to being touched. She hadn't been hugged, let alone held, in a long while. She knew her mother ... Had loved her, but she had never really been one to show it that much, even at the best of times. Neither Warren nor most of his girlfriends had been much for it either and the less she had to think back to foster care, the better ... Sofia did her best to try to ignore the overwhelming, confusing way it made her feel until was over.

After setting her down on the couch, the woman asked Sofia if she was hurt, to which she reflexively replied, "I'm f-fine," trying to keep thoughts of doctors from coming up again, even though it was practically hopeless that it would work. Aside from her size and height, her starkly pale skin was an obvious sign of exposure and she had more than a few scrapes that hadn't been able to heal too well.

The woman said she had pizza and offered to heat it. At this point, Sofia would have gladly accepted just about anything, but she couldn't deny that this particular offer was especially appealing. "Y-Yes, please," she then said. Ice cream was even more tempting, though was she less sure about taking that one up.

Sofia carefully accepted the glass she was given, making sure to say, "T-Thank you ." She drank the water ravenously, downing most of it in one big gulp, barely not choking up on it. Her sore throat eased a bit, making her let out a sigh of relief.

The woman introduced herself as Pepper and then asked her why she was there instead of being home. Sofia froze up again. She panicked, her heart thumping, as she desperately tried to figure out what to say. Trying to lie would almost certainly just make everything worse. Even if she could come up with anything believable, which was doubtful, it probably just make Pepper finally get mad about the break-in if she thought her intruder had had any other option.

After what seemed like a painful eternity, Sofia at long last decided there was no other choice but to admit the truth. "I-I ... Don't have a h-home," she finally uttered.

 

[PunkPrince]

The girl gulped down the water so quickly that Pepper was worried she might choke. She gave a small squeak of acceptance when Pepper offered to heat the pizza up for her, and Pepper stood up and took the plate of pizza to pop it in the microwave for a minute, figuring that it would be better to just get the girl some food as fast as possible rather than waste time heating it in the oven. She took the pint of ice cream from where it rested on the countertop and handed it to the child on the couch along with a spoon. "Here," she said. "You can have it. You need it more than I do."

Pepper wondered when the last time the kid had eaten was. Had it been days? Weeks? It had to have been a long time, given that she could hardly even stand up. She'd probably been outside for far too long too. She looked nearly frozen. She said she was fine when Pepper asked if she was hurt, but Pepper was unsure she was telling the truth. She chose not to press it for now. The kid had been through enough, it seemed. Best to just worry abut getting her fed.

The microwave beeped then, pulling Pepper from her thoughts. She opened the microwave and took the plate in her hands, careful not to burn herself. Steam rose from the food and the smell wafted through the air. Pepper made her way back over to the couch and held the plate out to the girl. "Here," she offered. "Be careful. It's still hot." Pepper watched the girl for a moment and then draped the nearest blanket over her shoulders before sitting back down on the edge of the couch.

It took a while for her unexpected guest to answer her next question. The child froze up and remained silent for almost a full minute before she finally spoke, telling Pepper she didn't have a home. Pepper raised an eyebrow. Surely the girl had had a home at some point? Or at least somewhere to stay. "No?" Pepper asked. "Where's your family? Surely they wouldn't want you on the street, not in this weather."

 

[Noctys]

Sofia doubted Pepper had believed her when she had denied being hurt, but at least she seemed to have thankfully let the matter go for now.
The woman insisted she could have the ice cream, holding the container and a spoon out to her. Starving and still quite tempted by the offer, the young girl could no longer resist accepting it. With a silent, slight nod, she carefully took hold of the objects.

She took a moment to move her backpack to sit beside her. Shen then lifted the lid off the tub and carved a good spoonful of ice cream out. Sofia brought it into her mouth, instantly relishing in the cold sweetness as it hit her tongue. It felt like pure bliss! After swallowing, she licked the spoon clean, savoring every last remaining drop, before quickly digging in for more and then again. By the time Pepper came back, she had already consumed a fair portion of the entire thing.

As Pepper approached the now heated-up pizza, Sofia took in the smell of it, finding it unbelievably entrancing. Setting the container down for the moment, she cautiously grabbed the plate. Heeding the warning, she slowly picked up a slice, blowing on it for a bit as she lifted it over to her mouth. Her face briefly lit in delight as she tasted the first bite. She was careful not to take in too much or do so too fast, not wanting to burn herself, yet it still wasn't too long before she had devoured the whole piece.

Upon Pepper asking where her family was, Sofia began to dejectedly shake her head, the movement seeming rather slow and lethargic. Her expression became stricken, gaze turning downwards, as she answered, "I don't k-know ..." She simply couldn't bear to say anything more on the subject, fearing it would make all the awful feelings that she had been desperately trying to keep at bay to burst right out.

 

[PunkPrince]

Pepper watched the girl eat the ice cream, hesitant at first, and then quickly digging in for more. By the time Pepper returned to the couch, the container was already half empty. She ate the pizza quickly too, and there was silence between the pair of them for a while. Pepper asking where her family was seemed to have hit a nerve, and she said she didn't know where they were. Pepper crossed and uncrossed her legs a few times, unsure of what to say next. Surely the girl couldn't just live on the street.

But she couldn't stay here. Pepper wasn't exactly maternal, and the life she led held no room for a child. Her work left her apartment unattended at night, and it could be dangerous, even though she pretended it wasn't. Most people didn't work with a knife strapped to their leg. Not for protection, at least. And Pepper probably spent more of her life drunk than sober. She had no desire, nor the needed skills to care for a child. But she couldn't just throw her back out on the street. Pepper was a lot of things, but she wasn't heartless. Prickly and hard to know, but not heartless.

Pepper let out a long sigh, leaning back against the couch for several moments, her eyes slowly trailing back over to the girl. "You wanna stay the night? Or at least, until I can figure something else out. You can take a shower if you want and I'll give you something to wear to bed. It won't fit, but it doesn't matter." Pepper shrugged. "I can make you up a bed on the couch and you can get some sleep. Better in here than out there. Besides, it's cold. You'll freeze if you try to sleep out there."

Pepper turned towards the bathroom then, figuring she might as well take her makeup off if she was going to be awake. She reached for a makeup wipe and slowly began to wipe at her face, stripping away the foundation, the eye makeup, the lipstick. The stubble on her face, visible beneath her makeup, becoming more prominent as she wiped the foundation away, and Pepper tossed the wipe away into the trash, staring at her own reflection for a moment before pressing her palms to her face with a tired groan.

 

[Noctys]

Sofia couldn't help but get more and more confused and surprised by the way Pepper was behaving in this whole situation. Mostly happily so, but she was shocked nonetheless. How the woman had reacted upon seeing her in the bed was more like what was expected from an owner who had discovered that she had broken into their house. She had feared that she would be yelled at, maybe even beaten. She had expected to have the police immediately called on her. Instead, apart from that first reaction, which did seem to have just instinct upon seeing someone on her bed, the woman had mostly just shown concern. She had given her food and was now offering to let her take a bath and stay for the night. Sofia couldn't for the life of her figure why she was doing all this, but she shouldn't look the gifted horse in the mouth at least for now. There probably were strings attached, there always were, but she wasn't planning to stick around anywhere near long enough for that to matter.

Staying there for the moment was her best option. It wasn't like she wanted to be back wandering the streets so soon, sleeping out in hard places and exposed to cold, but even aside from that, leaving on her own didn't seem feasible. If she refused to stay, Pepper would probably just end up calling someone sooner rather than later. Spending the night at least should give her some more time to find a way to prevent that. Plus, she could hardly leave through the same way she had entered and she would catch too much suspicion by leaving through any main doors when she hadn't gotten in there in the first place.

Lifting her gaze to look back up at Pepper, with a ghost of a smile peaking out, Sofia then said, "Y-Yeah, you're right. I think I'll take up on that."

While the woman went off to another room, Sofia set about finishing off her meal. The remaining pizza slices had cooled off a bit more by now, so she was able to consume them more quickly with less risk of burning herself. Once she was done with that, she began to eat the rest of the ice cream. After she was through with that as well, Sofia placed the empty plate and container on the nearest table.


Next, she supposes she should see about getting that shower. She wasn't quite up to leaving the couch yet but needed to.
It would hardly help her case if Pepper thought she was so weak that she barely walk. That would mean even less of a chance of being able to leave on her own.

Sofia slipped the blanket off and let it fall on the couch, then carefully slid her feet back down on the floor, using the edge of the seat to support and push herself up until she was standing. It wasn't without some struggle, still, slow but surely, she crossed the room until she reached where Pepper was. Looking up at the woman, Sofia then said, "Uh ... M-Mind if I go take that shower now?"

 

[Noctys]

Bump

 

[PunkPrince]

(I’m alive! Sorry, between my depression and all this coronavirus stuff I’ve been pretty beat lately)

The girl seemed confused by Pepper’s response to her presence, but Pepper couldn’t exactly blame her. Pepper wasn’t great with kids—she never had been—but she supposed that there were worse places she could have wound up. Far worse reactions she could have gotten too. Pepper had pulled a knife on her, but in her own defense, Pepper hadn’t known that she was just a kid. But the girl did finally agree to stay, which was better than her being outside.

As Pepper drifted off into the bathroom, the girl finished her food. Pepper could hear her shuffling about the kitchen to put the plates to the side. Good. She looked like she might disappear if she got any thinner. Some food, even if it was just pizza and ice cream, was better than no food at all. Pepper glanced back into the living room out of the corner of her eye as she wiped at her makeup.

“You got a name, pipsqueak?” Pepper called. She realized that she hadn’t asked, and it would be awfully difficult to share a space with someone whose name you didn’t know. She stepped back out into the living room, the girl looking up at her and asking about a shower. Pepper nodded and took a step to the side. “Go ahead,” Pepper told her. “I’ll get the couch set up for you.”

 

[Noctys]

(No worries. Under those circumstances, that is entirely understandable.)

Pepper inquired about her name, which caused Sofia to hesitate for a bit. On one hand, she would rather avoid giving away much about her identity. On the other, after the initial scare, Pepper had been nothing but kind, and she had introduced herself, so the nice thing to do in return would be to at least tell her first name. Even if she couldn't prevent being taken by social services, her name probably wasn't all that uncommon just by itself, so they wouldn't be able to do anything just with that anyway. She didn't have any documents on her, so as long as she refused to tell anyone any last names, it should at least delay them being able to figure out who she was. She had already fallen through the cracks for most of her life, so she might as well have that work for her rather than against this time around. She doubted even not having her record of moves and what her previous carers had said about automatically condemning her would do much to make anyone want to keep her for long, but at least it would be something.

Finally making her decision after a short while, she softly replied, "It is Sofia." Pepper stepped out of the way to the bathroom, telling Sofia she could go take the shower, while she went make a bed on the couch. The young girl gave a brief nod, saying, "A-Alright. Thanks ..." before making her way into the room and closing the door behind her.

Sofia quickly took off her clothes and put them down on the floor. She stepped into where the shower was and turned the water on, cautiously adjusting the knobs so that it would come out hot without becoming scalding. She got under the jets, wincing as the flow washed into some of her cuts. Sofia picked up a bath sponge and used some soap on it, proceeding to try to scrub all the grime off her skin as best as she could. After squirting some shampoo on her hands and spreading it through as much of her hair as was feasible. It had grown way longer than she would have really liked and was a tangled mess besides, so she had little hope of getting it all that clean in just one shower. She probably shouldn't take much longer than a few minutes anyway. Pepper had just gotten home when she had found Sofia on the bed, so she most likely would want to take a shower soon. It was best to avoid doing anything that would make the woman regret letting her stay the night and possibly even anger her.

Sofia rinsed everything off and turned the water off. After she stepped out, she grabbed a towel and started drying herself. She passed it through her hair enough so that it probably wouldn't take too long for the remaining moistness to dry out in the air. She put her panties and socks back on, then wrapped herself in the towel, picking the rest of her clothes up before opening the door slightly. Sofia couldn't let out a big yawn, still quite exhausted from the harsh conditions she had lived under and further lulled into sleepiness by the effect of the hot water.

Sofia then called through the crack, "Uh ... M-Miss Pepper? I'm done with the s-shower now ... Could you please bring some c-clothes?"

 

[Noctys]

Bump