Tasteless
Boink Bean
Every horrible monster you'll encounter in The Evil Within.
- The Haunted.
- Masked Haunted.
- s= The Keeper.
- Sadists
- Laura.
- s= Neun & Zehn.
- AlterEgos.
- Invisible Haunted.
- Trauma Haunted.
- Sentinel.
- Alpha.
- Shigyo.
- Heresy.
- Quell.
- Doppelganger.
- Ruvik.
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In an utterly unprecedented twist, the world of The Evil Within is populated by mangled, shambling creatures called the Haunted, which are neither alive nor dead. It is worth shaking off the sarcasm to note that the Haunted aren't your average shuffling horde, and treating them as such will get you ripped to pieces.
It's hard to explain the origins of the Haunted without leaping into a bloody spoiler pit, so I'll keep it vague. Something really bad happened to all of them and now their minds have more holes than swiss cheese. They seem to respond to only two things: the lighthouse atop Beacon Mental Hospital, and you. Poor, squishy you. They don't even want to eat your flesh or anything, all they want is to throw you on the ground and curb stomp you without hesitation. You're going to want to do everything you can to stay well out of their reach. Or put a knife in the back of their heads. Either or.
<p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_06/7b9605f1d194c466f7e438fae5e8e9fb1afd838f.jpg__846x0_q80.jpg.706104825d54c240adb730bf999fc9c2.jpg" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="58924" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_06/7b9605f1d194c466f7e438fae5e8e9fb1afd838f.jpg__846x0_q80.jpg.706104825d54c240adb730bf999fc9c2.jpg" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p>
Take the Haunted, make them smarter, give them creepy safety masks and heavy artillery, and you have the Masked Men. Yaaaay. These clown-faced creep-sacks are twice as threatening as other Haunted for the sheer fact that they can navigate environmental hazards and traps much better, and even one poses a serious threat to your survival. They're also much harder to take out with headshots because of their bulletproof masks. While it feels great to shoot that off their face, you'll often waste more ammo doing it than you can afford. They also get better weapons as the game progresses, and spotting one of those masks hovering over a machine gun will totally ruin your day.
The trick is to outsmart these guys before they can take you down. Even a smart Haunted has a few screws loose, and will still walk into a trap,stick their head into your crosshairs, or explode when you throw a grenade at them. Keep that in mind if you don't want to get killed by a crazy murder clown.
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A hulking, metal-skulled brute and Pyramid Head's squarer cousin, The Keeper is all about keeping precious things safe. Not that you'd know, because you're not on the list, and he's happy to massacre anything he's not protecting. According to the development team, The Keeper is the inspiration for much of the game's signature look. You can see the resemblance too: from his faceless geometric head to his disconcerting butcher's apron, the Keeper is an imposing and deeply unsettling figure. You'll often find him dragging corpses around and dropping barbed-wire traps for the unaware to tromp into. Make sure he doesn't see you with his lack of eyes or he'll quickly acquaint you with the business end of his spiked knapsack, because of course he has that.
The Keeper may not be fast, given his size, but he does have one nasty trick that will keep you running scared. As long as there's a safe nearby, he can possess it and regenerate in the goriest fashion possible like a safe-based Agent Smith.
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Sadists--men with metal head-masks and chainsaws who would make Quentin Tarantino weep with joy--should be familiar to anyone who saw The Evil Within's early gameplay demos. The guy who chases Sebastian around the mental hospital's bloody basement is one of them, which gives a clear picture of how much you should NOT mess with these guys. Though they're easily the least intelligent creatures you'll encounter outside standard Haunted, they don't need smarts to drive a spinning saw blade through your back and out your chest.
These dudes seem to have a sixth sense for detecting when you just got through some challenging stuff and would rather not die, which is when they tend to show up. Even one slash of that saw too close to home will break you into 1000 bloody pieces, so try to stay outside swinging radius. That's just good advice in general, really.
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Aww, Laura. What a pretty--OH MY GOD! Also known as ReBone Laura and Creepy Spider Lady Get Away From Me, her otherwise normal name disguises a grotesque, many-armed monster of Grudge-sized proportions. It's not a very good disguise though, since even before you know her name you get to witness her erupt out of a blood fountain while shrieking equally bloody murder. Just as her appearance implies, you'll want to run away from her as fast as you can, because if she catches you she'll beat your head in until it explodes. How unladylike.
Laura is definitely a demon to watch, and not just when looking over your shoulder as you sprint away. Files found early in the game suggest that someone named Laurais of importance to the world you find yourself in, and there are hints that she wasn't always so demonic. For instance, the developers pointed out that she wears shoes "in order to keep a piece of her humanity." I checked myself and confirmed she totally IS wearing shoes--you know, before she ripped my head off.
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You've got double trouble when you're facing off against twins Neun and Zehn. Or actually quadruple trouble, since each one is twice your height and weight. Both of these hulking brothers have unique personalities, with Zehn being the shy one and Neun being so aggressive that his eyes and ears have been covered so nothing upsets him too much. Though wouldn't that in and of itself be irritating? Just saying. Either way, both also have their own fighting styles to contend with: Neun will not stop charging until he's steamrolled you, and Zehn can hurl a club that will take off your head. So much for being "shy."
Combating these two has its difficulties, for obvious reasons, and the best strategy seems to be to run around in circles while taking potshots. There's also a hidey-hole in one part of their abode, but fate help you if each twin sits at either entrance. At that point, all that's left to figure out is if you want to be beaten or stomped to death.
<p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_06/e744d46cba194c936881cc052c45cebfd96673d7.jpg__846x0_q80.jpg.cb45586a5d1adf2010e94503669f4132.jpg" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="58932" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_06/e744d46cba194c936881cc052c45cebfd96673d7.jpg__846x0_q80.jpg.cb45586a5d1adf2010e94503669f4132.jpg" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p>
Uh, I think this dude's got something on his shoulder. Oh no, my mistake, it's just his other, grosser, angrier head. Silly me, that's part of the territory with the AlterEgos, now please excuse me while I curl up in a ball and cry. Designed to be reminiscent of dual personalities in cases of Dissociative Identity Disorder, this two-headed beast has one head that's the stronger of the pair and dominates the body, while the other goes dismally along for the ride. You might also run into an AlterEgo with only one head, and you'll want to get the hell out of there, because the more vicious of the two heads is about to come bursting out of their collective chest in one hell of a nasty Alien/Total Recall homage.
In addition to all of that, these dudes are so tough that they barely notice grenades going off in their faces. Their big weakness is their legs, which can be blown out from under them with a couple good shotgun blasts. Make sure to stomp and burn though, or they'll kill you by chomping your ankles. Naturally.
<p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_06/4b03c871eccd28726cdfcbffddb3679af22811df.jpg__846x0_q80.jpg.0a2c8d80c6ec0493daaeb3c973eeec0b.jpg" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="58934" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_06/4b03c871eccd28726cdfcbffddb3679af22811df.jpg__846x0_q80.jpg.0a2c8d80c6ec0493daaeb3c973eeec0b.jpg" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p>
You're wandering through a creepy hospital, as will often happen in horror games, and you hear an odd squelching noise in the distance. You look around, finding nothing, in time to see a gurney roll across the floor all on its own. Keep calm, keep calm, only try to scare yo--and the thought ends there because you just got punched to death by nothing with glimpses of something flashing in between. Congratulations, you've just met the invisible Haunted, inexplicably squid-faced shufflers who remain invisible until the moment after they attack. Well isn't that a barrel of bullshit fun?
These guys are a massive pain because of how hard they hit and the aforementioned cannot-be-seen quirk, so you have to beat them at their own game. Standing in a puddle helps, because you can see where their steps are and fire in that general direction. Alternatively, you can fire an explosive into a doorway and wait for them to walk over it--but do it fast, or you might accidentally hit them and explode yourself when they attack you. Not that I'd know or anything.
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Now this is a monster with a lot of weight on its shoulders. Like, literally--the Trauma Haunted carries a big ol' wooden beam on its back. I suppose that compliments its massive claws and messed-up face, and it sure does the job of making this beast look weird and terrifying. Official word also says the shoulder-beam is a nod toward religious corruption and indoctrination, leading to the idea that this is a bastardization of a prominent religious figure who famously carried a heavy burden and wow that got uncomfortable fast. That's the Trauma Haunted in a nutshell: uncomfortable to look at, uncomfortable to think about, uncomfortable when it's shoving its big metal nails into your gut.
Though the Trauma Haunted just lumbers around most of the time and can be outrun, that doesn't help when you're trapped in a tiny room with it. Which is basically every time you meet one, since it seems that claustrophobic spaces are its natural habitat. My suggestion is to try to outmaneuver it as best you can, because in addition to being freaky and gigantic? It's also a bullet sponge. Greeeeeat.
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This is definitely not man's best friend. Bred by a cult in the catacombs beneath their cemetery and raised on a diet of sacrifice victims (because they do not half-ass their mutant wolf husbandry), Sentinel is the guardian of the church and the last line of defense against… something. You, I suppose, because the second you put a toe in its territory, you're as good as dog-food. Not the kibble kind either--the nasty table scraps kind.
You almost feel bad for Sentinel the first time you see it, because someone went to a lot of pains (probably literally) to keep it muzzled and caged. That sympathy gets cut clean off when the beast busts out of all its restraints and goes for your throat. Sentinel is bigger than you, faster than you, and has way sharper teeth than you, so your best bet is to unload everything you have (what little of that there is) to try and bring him down. Bad dog, very bad dog!
And this is why I avoid giant dystopic-looking underground spaces at all costs. You never know when something like this is going to show up. An amalgamation of Haunted fused together under what I assume were horrific and painful circumstances, the Alpha is a mindless wreck of madness and viscera. You know this creature is serious business because it shows up outside windows and in the middle of Sebastian's mentally-fractured freakouts from early on, and stars in at least one hallway chase sequence before you come face-to-face-to-face-to-face with it for real.
It catches you, as you’ve probably guessed, inside an abandoned underground with plenty of space to thrash you about. And that car you were just hiding behind? Alpha picked it up and threw it like it was made of styrofoam and empty dreams. Yeah, have fun with that. And sorry if you can never use a parking garage again. My bad.
Shigyo the man-shark was apparently a lost soul that drowned somewhere in this nightmare-scape and became a water demon. That sounds like the craziest fish story ever, but whatever. It now spends its days nabbing anyone stupid enough to swim through its waters, dragging them under like a creepier and nastier Jaws. You are definitely going to need a bigger boat.
Unfortunately, We don't get a boat at all, because that's the kind of luck we have. Sections where we're separated from our goal by even a pond-sized patch of H2O can be deadly, because Shigyo is relentless in its commitment to ruining your day. Thankfully, it also seems unable to tell the difference between a warm body and a cold one. If you can get a corpse in the water, it'll act as a nice distraction while you dive in. Now swim! Swim like your life depends on it because it does.
Ever had a spider fall on your head from their ill-chosen ceiling spot? That sucks for a normal person, and gets ten times worse if watching those little dudes crawl makes your skin... crawl. Now imagine that, except the spider is about 10,000 times bigger and uglier and ripping the roof off a bus. That's Heresy, the gigantic half-human half-arachnid, and you have to kick him to the literal curb. It's okay, don't cry.
A bit different from the Spider-Man you probably remember, Heresy nonetheless rules his city, even if he can best be described an amorphous pink blob with breathing problems balanced on nasty, hairy spider legs. Supposedly a mutated human soul run amok, he clearly wants you out of his town, and more than once you will have to deal with an arachnophobe's worst nightmare when he chases you relentlessly through the streets.
There are species of squid that can make their bodies transparent or use camouflage as a defense mechanism. I don't know that for any admirable, scholarly reason--I just wanted to know why there are two squid enemies that can turn invisible in The Evil Within’s nightmare world, because oh goddamnitcome on! You know about the first tentacle-faced cheater, but the second is infinitely more intimidating: Quell, the full-on land squid, with eight nasty ways to mess you up.
Oddly enough, this wriggly guy actually helps you at first, because he's perfectly willing to kill the enemies trying to take your head off. That is, until you get to the heart of his lair, at which point he is no longer your friend. While he's got some slick moves (probably literally; watch where you step), what makes him downright frightening is the fact that he can vanish without a trace. He uses that to send stealth larva-bombs at you (just go with it) or jump out and nab you from nowhere. Like I said, cheater.
Well this is vain of you, secretive hooded antagonist. I know you have a packed schedule of wandering around mysteriously and staring at us through barred gates (little weird, dude), but you're really so busy that you have to send a doppleganger to do your dirty work? I guess the faceless blood-vomiting is a nice touch, but really, if you want something done right…
The Doppleganger acts as a sentinel when his original can't be bothered to kill you, commanding hordes of Haunted like his own personal undead army. That doesn't seem so bad until he turns around and spots you, then lets out the sort of blood-freezing scream that belongs in a slasher movie and erupts in a crimson wave. Then his hemoglobin-coated claw friends show up, a series of arms that chase you around until they grab and literally rip you apart. Hmm, creepy, spindly arms shooting out of the floor.
Turns out this guy does have a name besides secretive hooded antagonist or the much snappier mystery hood guy, and that name is Ruvik. Developers have kept mum about this keen-eyed fellow other than to say "you never know when Ruvik will make an appearance," and that's pretty much on the mark. He shows up in the first five minutes to give you a zoom-enhanced stink-eye, and after that you never know where you're going to turn a corner and find him staring holes in you. And then putting holes in you.
Ruvik's methods really are mysterious, given that he can kill you by tapping you on the shoulder but doesn't make it a priority. When he does appear he follows you at an intimidating distance, giving you plenty of space to run your terrified behind off before he vanishes into the ether. That is, as long as he doesn't actually catch you, because this isn't abomination amateur hour and he will obliterate you if you let him. I'd say don't mess with him, but he's the bad guy. You're not gonna have much choice.
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