Fandom Seasons of the Skaian Calendar: A Homestuck Roleplay

[SerbianMounted]

How to explain in a way that won't elicit like, 30 more difficult questions...
Okay so, consider it like this, I am a part of a session that is linked to yours.
Because the purpose of these game sessions is to create new life and universes, okay?
Beyond a lot of little details, that's the final goal, I don't know if you've been informed of that yet or not.
And your session, ultimately, or at least I think helped create mine.
So I was able to track you down through, let's just say....methods, which if we got into would take even more explanation and understandings of time I don't think either of us are qualified to have.
Gosh this must be really confusing to you, apologies.

==> Opal: Speak to Euryalesprite

Orin has gone to the trouble of prototyping your sprite with the body of your DEAD SNAKE. You hadn't realized it in all the commotion of your entry, but it seems like the old girl's heart died out in all the chaos. She was a sensitive older gal, after all. You hold out a hand, and the slithering tongue of your dear pet Euryale flicks into the air to greet you.
​

Spoiler: Spirtelog

OPAL: eury? that you girl?
EURYALESPRITE: hellooooooo~
OPAL: wow!!!!! it....it really is you!!!!
EURYALESPRITE: hehehehe, of courssssssse it'sssss me~
EURYALESPRITE: who elssssssse could pull off pink thissssssss well?
OPAL: oh gosh eury, i was like, so totally terrified when i thought you were dead!!!!
OPAL: im like so happy youre back, i dont know what i woulda done without you girl < 3333333333
EURYALESPRITE: heehee!! glad to know i'm sssssssooooo dearly wanted around here
EURYALESPRITE: mhhh, i jusssssssst got the biggesssst hankering for a nice fat moussssssse~
OPAL: oh well, maybe we could alchemize some food for you?
EURYALESPRITE: Ah, mmmmmmaaaaaaaaaaaaybe at a different time opal
EURYALESPRITE: we have bigger fisssssssssssssssssh to fry right now
OPAL: ?
EURYALESPRITE: dear girl, i have jussssssssssssst been blesssssssssed with all manner of knowledge of great import
EURYALESPRITE: pertaining to your pressssseence here on this planet~
OPAL: like, with the game and stuff?
EURYALESPRITE: exactly~
EURYALESRPITE: you are one of four heroes that have been tasssssssked with the ssssssssssalvation of your resssssspective worldsssss
EURYALESPRITE: your duty, assssss the sssssssseeer of heart, issss to journey out into your land and lisssssten to the heartbeat of the world
OPAL: the....heartbeat of the world?
OPAL: like in pocahontas?
EURYALESPRITE: no clue what that issssss
OPAL: got it, movie watch party scheduled for later
EURYALESPRITE: regardlessssss, the conssssortssss of thissss world are in total disssaray, and have lossst the ability to commune with their patron goddesssss
EURYALESPRITE: ssssssshee livesss at the core of this planet, and her voice echoesssss through all itsssss beingsssss and momentsss
EURYALESPRITE: your job isssss to go and reconvene with thisssss losssst voice, and bring back an era of peace to this land
OPAL: woah....
OPAL: that sounds pretty cool!
EURYALESPRITE: i'm glad you think ssssso, i'm ssssssure the consssooortsss will appreciate your optimisssssm
EURYALESPRITE: lisssteen, opal
EURYALESPRITE: this isssss a tassssk that will challenge you in wayssss you have never been challenged before
EURYALESPRITE: you will need caution, patience and the ability to open your heart in wayssss that may feel uncomfortable
OPAL: play peacemaker between a bunch of salamanders and revive an ancient dead goddess thing in the core of the world
OPAL: gotcha, anything else before i go?
EURYALESPRITE: hehehehehe, you have alwayssssss been sssssuch a plucky one
EURYALESPRITE: i will be here ssssshould you need me, defending your home from the impsssss
EURYALESPRITE: i love you, opal~
OPAL: i love you tooo!!!!!!!!!!!! < 333333
OPAL: um, well, actually, i do have a question
EURYALESPRITE: yesssssss?~
OPAL: do you think, like
OPAL: well, uh, er, this is a little annoying to put together
OPAL: do you think i should apologize to orin?
EURYALESPRITE: the prince~?
OPAL: uh, sure? i just kind got into a major argument with him over basically nothing, and we just pissed each other off by being ourselves, as usual
OPAL: and i can't tell if it would be the better thing to apologize to him or just, give him space or, maybe even let him come to me?
EURYALESPRITE: in my time asssss an animal that did not leave the confinessssss of a glasssss cassse for many years
EURYALESPRITE: i did not pick up on the exact nuancessss of human relationshipssss
EURYALESPRITE: but assssss your guide asssss the sssseer of heart, i can tell you that it issssss in your besssst interesssst to first understand where othersssss are coming from
EURYALESPRITE: perhapssss orin isssss in a much more ssssimilar situation as you are in, and isssss ssstruggling to make the "right choice"
OPAL: .....i don't really like that answer
OPAL: which probably means your right
OPAL: i'll think on it, eury
OPAL: thanks for the advice!
EURYALESPRITE: you're welcome~

With a warm hug (that is mostly Euryalesprite wrapping her tail around your body and neck), you begin your journey to depart from the first gate.

==> Be future P.E again

You are being future P.E again, who is again watching GIANT FLOATING RECTANGLE hover closer and closer towards you. The metal station CRASHES to the ground with an enormous THUD that rumbled the earth beneath you. You nearly stumble and drop your bag of ICE. You rest the bag on the top of the METAL STATION and peer out into the desert. A figure emerges, a tall, thin BLACK CARAPACE draped in a sullen, tattered GRAY SUIT.

He looks over at you, and with wide eyes gives a WIDE ECSTATIC WAVE, charging towards the station from where he is.

Hey! HEY YOU SIR! RIGHT THERE! YOU WANNA BUY A WATCH????​

 

[Eidolon Astronaut]

CA: Not really, I've already gotten the gist on the whole universe creation thing.
CA: Long-story-short, you're from a future universe - specifically the one that me and my friends will make (or assist in making) at some point down the line?
CA: I was transported to another dimension by a video game and talked to a robot ghost.
CA: Time travel doesn't seem that far-fetched anymore.

 

[SerbianMounted]

Time travel is really the least of it, when you get into the fact that I'm an alien.
Not to uh, blow your mind or anything, heh.
But yeah, you've got it in one.
Long story short is that we booted up a session after our planet was destroyed by meteors, and by going into some of the deep parts of the game, we were able to figure out more about you and your friends, and how we came about.
Supposedly every session has traces and hints of its universe's creators, maybe even yours!

 

[Eidolon Astronaut]

CA: I see. So your exploration of the game led you to us.
CA: Did you learn anything that would be practical information for us about our futures?
CA: You appear to be a real person, ergo we must actually *win* for your upcoming creation, but there's still a lot I don't know.
CA: And even more I don't know that I don't know.

 

[SerbianMounted]

Well, not really?
If your sprite has given you the lowdown on the situation and what you're meant to do, that's pretty much all I could give you as well.
No two sessions are alike, each planet, each denizen, and really each series of events for the Kings and Queens, Derse and Prospit are custom tailored to each set of players and molded by their actions in game.
The specifics of your session are as clear to me as they are to you, I don't even know your classpects.
There are some more nuanced things occurring (possibly) in the background, but they're all tiny factors largely out of your control, things the game is doing to further customize the experience and seed the future of your session, but that's not really helpful here.
If you're confused about something, or need some consultation from an outside eye though, maybe I can give you some advice! I have a lot of experience doing this, so maybe I can piece together a better answer than someone who's flyig blind like you.

You approach the floating island in the center of the abyss. The island has within it a MAUSOLEUM, roughly the size of your living room/exhibit back home. Its stone walls are dilapidated and on its closed stone door is the hooded vestige of the same figure from the square, her snake like body curling into many knots which form a complex DOOR PUZZLE for you to solve. ​

 

[Eidolon Astronaut]

CA: Alright, I'll keep that in mind and use your information as needed.
CA: I do have one immediate question though:
CA: You said you're an alien, right? What exactly are you, if you don't mind me asking?
CA: And does it have anything to do with the fact that you don't seem to have a username on Pesterchum?
CA: I know that second bit isn't really important, but it's a curious tidbit I'd like to know.

> Joan: Investigate door puzzle.​

 

[SerbianMounted]

Oh, what am I....
Uhhhh?
Sorry contextualizing your race when you're not used to interacting with other species is a toughie.
I guess since what little I could glean about your species indicated you guys were like, descended from apes, right?
Well we share a basic silhouette, but we were descended from goats.
The proper name is Faun. We tend to have hairless bodies, and furred legs with cloven hooves like the livestock, and horns.
The reason that I don't have a chum handle is actually pretty funny! We didn't have any chat software that was compatible with you guys yet. Figures your 'Pesterlog' is the equivalent of our 'Bleeter'. But we couldn't come up with a way to like, download the software???
So I improvised, and found an old Dersian communications hub on this ship we're using, and am basically just sending you messages like that.
Haha, I guess I could type my abbreviated handle before my messages though, if that gives the whole thing the proper 'feel'.

==>

This puzzle proves difficult, but NO MATCH against your gumption filled puzzle sleuthing skills. You take a beat and eventually figure out the puzzle, opening up the door and letting its double doors swing inwards after the mysterious icon is shown to you. Before you are TWO STONE COFFINS, one of which has a STRANGE PARTED SPIRAL SYMBOL ABOVE IT, the other having the symbol but INVERSE.​

 

[Eidolon Astronaut]

CA: So you pretty much match up with human mythology of what Faun are.
CA: Or at least a version with more modern levels of technology compared to ancient Rome, as they were more forest-dwelling madness-and-revelry enthusiasts with no real desire for advanced civilisation.
CA: I'd prefer if you did, no real reason why though beyond the fact that it does just *feel* right.
CA: What is your chat handle?

> Joan: Examine tomb.

You peer around the dark, damp mausoleum to see the two COFFINS on either side of you. A small pedestal lies in front of you bearing a plaque that reads thus:

"Knight, set before you is a choice of what path you shall first take as a Hero in this Land. Before you is a Path of Stars, the other a Path of Shadows. While you may only choose one, know that your decision will fundamentally change the shape of your journey and how you aid your allies."

Two paths diverge where you cannot travel both? You'd make a joke about a lack of any yellow wood, but you'll leave the poetry references to Orin. STARS or SHADOWS, which will you choose? Yeah right, you can't ask a future astronaut to pick between "stars" and anything else and expect the latter.

You use the SAWTOOTH GENERATOR to pry open the SPIRAL COFFIN.​

 

[SerbianMounted]

==>

I SAID HEY SIR, SIR? A MOMENT OF YOUR TIME? WHY DON'T I TELL YOU SOMETHING THAT'LL MAKE YOUR DAY!

You, now as P.E once again, turn away as though you and this clearly disreputable salesman had not just made direct and prolonged eye contact, and are also not the only two living things on this planet for what could be hundreds of miles. The DESPERATE MERCHANT comes up to you anyways...

He begins to quickly explain to you that he found this absolutely marvelous automobile in the middle of the desert for completely free! He carries on to say that you are the first person he has encountered in years, and despite your dissimilar carapaces, who cares about a war hard fought and all for naught many years ago? He carries on to explain that he's run out of fuel, and that he's willing to give you a fair trade: he will explain how to operate your craft if you give him passage on yours.

You roll your eyes, damn merchants. You explain that you have no real interest in traveling even if you knew how to operate a craft, much less understood that it was a craft several hours ago when you first found it. Where is there to go, anyways? It's all desert for miles and miles. You just wish to grow your crops and farm a peaceful life. You explain that if he tries your patience, you will be tempted to break your vow of pacifism.

He holds up his hands, apologizing for wasting your time, until under his breath as he strides back to his craft he mentions he knows of an Oasis far from here, a place that would actually be suitable for growing vegetation. But if you're not interested, oh well.

You grab him by the lapels, and he extends a black clawed hand, and flashes a smile with many sharpened teethe, few of which are capped in 'gold'.

Deal?

==> Orin: What's the deal?

The deal is heat, is what. But not the kind of heat that comes from deadly, ensuing meteors onto your location. You know you're safe after a few close calls and Arlo helping you DEPLOY YOUR CRUXITE ARTIFACT. It was a GREEN CRUIXTE EFFIGY, the likes of which you lit AFLAME and watched crumble to ash almost instantly.

You emerge from your hut, your GUARDIAN LONG GONE. The house is so small a good chunk of the desert mesa came with it, and it feels as though you just stepped into a giant SAUNA. Surrounding you on all sides are CAVERNOUS WALLS that encompass a small lake of BOILING WATER. In some spots the heat is so potent the water erupts into giant geysers. You feel yourself sweating already. Next to you is ROBINSPRITE, you suppose it could've been worse when Arlo prototyped your kernel with your collection of Cowboy Vinyl, but it could've been better. Whenever you ask this asshole a question he just sings 'El Paso' at you.

==> Orin: Emerge from Cave

You do so, leaving your duster behind as sweat pours profusely down your body. You are almost BADLY SCALDED by the water as it bursts next to you when navigating the stepping stone platforms about the caves lake. You emerge from the cave's entrance, and find yourself surrounded on all sides by...well, heat. For all the eye can see is a VAST and unending wasteland of cracked rock and geysers spewing boiling water. The air is oppressive, and the ground so hot it feels like you could boil an egg just by letting it sit there.

Welcome to the Land of Boil and Labors.

I front of you is a placard on a pedestal, you almost touch it but realize you'll just give yourself second degree burns since it's metal. Inscribed is the following:

Prince, I am Yaldabaoth, know me and know fear. The quest of your land is thus: complete my 12 labors and I shall bequeath unto you great power. Fail and know ruination.

==>

Meanwhile, using the cello bow as a fulcrum-now as Joan-you pry open the coffin for the PATH OF STARS. The coffin, now open, reveals a set of stairs that lead down into the darkness. Along the wall is a long, descending mural, decorated with a language you don't recognize. However, assumedly its translated version is scrawled along the underside to narrate the pictures that accompany it. It reads like a fairy tale.

Once upon a time, when the world was new and stars ran free, there lived a land of eternal crisp autumn, whose people prospered under the sacred protection of their goddess: Echidna. The land awaited the arrival of Echidna's champion, the Knight, who would lead the land into greater prosperity than it had ever known before. The sacred Hero's arrival was foretold, and the consorts of the land would prepare Echidna's demesne for her.

However, one day, shadow befell the blanket of endless stars that bloomed in the sky, a reflection of Echidna's night. Echidna's shadow grew restless and malevolent. The misbegotten shadow was angered by the prevalence of Echinda and her glory, and wished to steal the light of space for herself, to feed an endless, all consuming void.

So Kaukek, as the shadow would call herself, cast an evil spell to enchant the land and seal it away from the Hero, so the hero could never stoke the mighty forge, nor light its divine spark so the powers of Space and Time might converge to allow true bounty to befall this land and all lands between. The mighty forge was hidden away from the hero, its people transformed into shadows of themselves, and the land mostly sunken into nothingness.

Kaukek would entomb herself in the core of the earth, Echidna sunken into a torpor like sleep without end under her rule. The enchantress of night and shadow would await the arrival of the Hero of Space, so that she might either devour her whole, or tempt her with great power. But hark! These events as they have transpired were whispered into the ear of Echidna by the mighty Hephaestus, who foretold her downfall in warning to his fellow goddess.

And in keeping with her divinity, Echidna prepared a means by which the mighty Knight of Space could rise and slay the beast of night:

Before you at the end of the staircase is a small pedestal upon which sits a neatly triangular folded CLOAK OF STARS. The silver stars twinkle on the fabric, and the pattern is so photorealistic it's almost as if you're watching a live feed of a galaxy from many lightyears distance away. Behind the pedestal is a portal that glows faintly and takes the form of a familair spirograph.
​

ES: engineeredSeraphim [ES].
ES: And actually that description lines up really well with my race! A lot of them preferred to be completely without technology.
ES: I was a bit of an oddball case for a few reasons, me and my sister both. Even though she never seemed much bothered by not 'fitting in'.

 

[Eidolon Astronaut]

> Joan: Record mural.

You hold a hand to the side of your helmet to record what you are seeing, filming the mural for any future relevance it will have. Once at the bottom at the stairs, you inspect the CLOAK OF STARS. You don't fully grasp what you're looking at, or what you're even supposed to do with it, since magical space cloak doesn't really mesh with the aesthetic of "realistic astronaut suit."

You captchalogue the cloak and hop into the portal.​

CA: You have a sister?

 

[SerbianMounted]

ES: Sure do!
ES: I don't really know how much she wants to meet all of you, and she's a bit busy right now which is why she hasn't introduced herself, but the boys of your session might be in contact with her already.
ES: She came with me from our session, and she's a real sweetheart, even if she pretends like she isn't.
ES: Her name is Solas, and we're twins. We played our game together.

==>

You emerge on the other side of the PORTAL to find yourself in a much more hospitable and friendly world than the one you left. You realize only now that the portal you leapt through was in fact probably your second GATE, the one that Arborsprite had mentioned. The air is fresh here, and smells of roses, you are standing on some game constructed DECK PLATFORMS, an extension of a ship that forms Opal's house. You can see in the distance that the girl in question is surrounded by adorable Pink Salamanders. They only go up to her knee, and are hassling her for her attention, all speaking at once. ​

 

[Eidolon Astronaut]

CA: I see.
CA: Well, Equio, thanks for sending us the game.
CA: I have to go save my friend from some harrowing herptiles.
CA: We'll be in touch.

> Joan: Approach accosting amphibians.

You LASS SCRAMBLE down the platforms and shitty stairs of the house boat in which your friend resides; you're not one to judge someone by whatever strange buildings they live in, just look at your own house. You touch down on the grassy lake-shore, space boots slightly wet from wading through the lake. You walk over to the squad of salamanders, and more importantly the familiar human face in middle of the nestle of newts.​

JOAN: Need a hand?

 

[SerbianMounted]

==>
​

OPAL: joan!!!!!!

Opal looks around as the toga wearing salamanders flank her on all sides. She brandishes a CUTE PINK UMBRELLA WITH KITTEN EARS and opens it, buffeting a few of the endlessly GLUBBING salamanders away from her. She grabs your hand and is yanked out of the center of the crowd. She twirls her umbrella, resting it on her shoulder as she wags her finger and shouts at the Grecian molesters.
​

OPAL: piss off!!!! i need ta talk to my friend ya glubbin' ingrates!
SALAMANDER #1: GLUB
SALAMANDER #2: GLUB GLUB GLUB GLUB GLUB
SALAMANDER #3: That actually hurt my feelings! glub < / 3

The salamanders disperse from you both as Opal heaves a sigh of relief and exhaustion. She wears black denim short shorts with a small white button up blouse tucked into them. She also wears heart embroidered SUSPENDERS and a gardening hat.
​

OPAL: maaan, i'm sorry you had to see that joan
OPAL: i promise i'm not as bad at this as it just seemed
OPAL: also ohmigosh!!!!!!!!!!! you're finally standing here, in front of me, like, phyiscally totally really here!!!!!
OPAL: wow you're taller than i thought you'd be! : 0

She wraps her hands tightly around you, giving you a big hug. ​

 

[Eidolon Astronaut]

After the hug, you remove the ASTROTOP from your head, deobscurifying your face. It's only polite.​

JOAN: Yep, totally really.
JOAN: And all it took was a game sent to us by aliens that nearly killed us.
JOAN: You're alright, right? No mortal wounds or anything?

You step back a little to glance over Opal for any scrapes or wounds that could cause dips in her HEALTH VIAL.​

 

[SerbianMounted]

==>

You notice no wounds, mortal or otherwise, on Opal's body. Though there are a few memories of those such wounds. Scars along Opal's arms, feint and shallow but present. She's seen combat and healed from it, like you.

OPAL: nothing a few snacks and health potions can't fix Joan
OPAL: those salamanders werent like, accosting me or anything??? well, not literally
OPAL: the salamanders were just, well, being annoying
OPAL: see, my quest here is to 'listen to the heart of all things', and i tried speaking to some of land's consorts
OPAL: and those motherfuckers are CHATTY, like, endlessly CHATTY
OPAL: all these opinions about any random assortment of things, all at once, nothing of particular importance either
​

 

[Eidolon Astronaut]

JOAN: "Listen to the heart of all things?"
JOAN: Is that a quest that your sprite gave you?
JOAN: That doesn't sound possible, many things don't have hearts.
JOAN: Like what if your land was filled with nothing but jellyfish?

 

[SerbianMounted]

OPAL: y know joan the worst part of that is how i really don't know if you're just goofing around with me
OPAL: or if you really are just that painfully literal
OPAL: wait, jk, jk, did you just say something about aliens???
OPAL: and what about YOU!?!??! what's your cool fantasy land like
OPAL: i bet it's some kinda gnome infested tree land with big tall shrubs
OPAL: seems to fit into your whole deal

 

[Eidolon Astronaut]

JOAN: Oh, are you not caught up on the aliens?
JOAN: Seems we have a pair of mysterious benefactors. A sibling pair, Equio and Solas.
JOAN: They're the ones who sent us the game, or at least Equio did.
JOAN: And no, my "cool fantasy land" might as well not exist, it's... broken, or sealed away, by my browser Kaukek apparently.
JOAN: It's just one big empty void.

 

[SerbianMounted]

OPAL: oohhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! you mean equio!
OPAL: yeah, i've chatted with him a bit, he was actually the one that suggested i talk to some of my consorts to get a feel of the world
OPAL: had no idea he was an alien though, wow
OPAL: though xochiquetzal, or xochi as i like to call her, is a bit different
OPAL: apparently many years ago she used to live on the surface with the consorts
OPAL: she lived like a QUEEN, and though no one can seem to agree on exactly HOW, she was incredibly beautiful and talented
OPAL: so all the consorts would throw gifts at her feet and fawn over her, make art of her, sonnets, plays, all kinds of art really
OPAL: and eventually they started to war with each over like, over her favor????
OPAL: surprise surprise the girl left after the vibe got too harsh, and has been sleeping in the core of the planet ever since
OPAL: now the consorts are mad as ever, fighting over her and blaming each other for her leaving

==> Orin: Get pestered

You're dodging BOILING GEYSERS when you get a CHIPPER RINGTONE that signifies you're getting a TEXT from someone.
​

Spoiler

SE: yo

Spoiler

CG: Felicitations?
SE: haha, dude you almost got your face scalded off harvey dent style and the idea was to use the longest synonym you could find for 'hello'?
CG: I believe the key to good first impressions is good choice in syntax and grammar, when possible.
CG: Just because I'm dodging to save my flesh from third degree burns doesn't mean the present moment may be excluded.
SE: mad respect
CG: Though, I do have to ask: who are you?
SE: solas, i'm a player of this game too, though not this session of this game in particular
SE: me and my brother are veterans here to give you four a hand, he's handling the girls and i said i would pick up the slack with you and arlo
SE: though, uh, i don't have much time to do that
CG: How do you know our names?
SE: uhhhhh, ask joan, she and equio have probably gone through this whole deal already
CG: Okay...
CG: And with regard to you helping us?

Spoiler

SE: my whole contribution to that department largely comes in the form of something called the reckoning, which i'm guessing your sprite filled you in on already
CG: So the end of the game is your endgame. What about your brother?
SE: y'know arlo at least had the decency to bother with the formalities
SE: guys pretty rad
CG: You've talked to him?
SE: he IS a boy, right?
SE: cuz if that's the case then yeah, per my explaining earlier
CG: Ah, I suppose I should've surmised.
CG: Apologies for making you retread tired ground, I'm just a little frazzled from, uh, well, the heat.
SE: yeahhhhh, i kinda meant to contact you sooner to forewarn you about the whole yaldabaoth thing
SE: he sucks
CG: You know about this monster?
SE: know him? i fought the asshole
SE: and lemme tell ya, i know i said it before but the shit bears repeatin, straight up: guy BLOWS
CG: I kinda surmised from the doom and gloom portent about the labors.
SE: oh god, of course he just gave you a problem and told you to start running
SE: see, most players live with the luxury of going through these interesting poetic little adventures through candy colored worlds with intrigue, messing around with consorts and solving puzzles and shit
SE: us meanwhile? fuuuuuck, our denizen just wants a contest of pure strength and will
CG: So you bested him in combat?
SE: barely, i was MUCH lower on my echeladder than i should've been, my approach to the game back then was much stupider and lazier than my brother
SE: he always wanted to take his time, soak up the experience and read the lore, really get his money's worth and all, but me.....ehhhh
SE: let's just say i had a lot of anger and not a lot of outlets, so pushing my limits to the greatest extent was my venting for the longest time
CG: Sounds therapeutic.
SE: hell nah it wasn't
CG: I...know, I was being facetious.
SE: fa wha?

==> DM, fly this thing

You pull some levers and throw some switches, and sooner rather than later the whole of the METAL ROOM your newest friend has occupied begins to shake. From outside, the sand begins to part as a giant metal TUBE begins to float in the air, the DM chuckles wryly as he begins to tap more and more on the command station, feeding the thing commands.

PE asks just how you managed to get so good at commanding these things. You explain that before you went into the private sector, and then the EXILED sector, you used to operate the cloning pads in the ORIBTAL BELT for the dersian army. PE gives you a knowing nod, and you both seem to silently bond over your mutual if formerly opposed efforts in the great war. It all feels so pointless now, looking back. You tell PE the ride is gonna be LONG, but he does have something for just such an occasion.

He pulls out a PACK OF PLAYING CARDS, and you ask him if he knows how to play poker.

==> Be past DM

You are now the DEVIOUS MOUNTEBANK. You wear a SLICK, yellow pinstripe suit and laugh as you lay your cards flat on the table. ROYAL STRAIGHT FLUSH baby! Beat THAT!!! The other dersians scoff and groan as they look at your (not so natural) luck and you quickly turn to the shuttle headed STRAIGHT for one of the lands of the heroes. You won your ticket FAIR AND SQUARE, after all. you begin to operate the controls to the CAR and float off, not realizing a particularly SHORT and BLUNDERING dersian has snuck aboard behind you.

==> Joan: Get Pestered!
​

GG: yo, joan
GG: kind of needing your help here
GG: i need to enter
GG: it uh, isn't too much of a rush really but
GG: i figured i'd get it out of the way

 

[Eidolon Astronaut]

JOAN: So what, the salamanders are trying to make you the new queen or something?
JOAN: Maybe long boring conversations are how they try to impress you?
JOAN: This place *does* seem pretty "Ancient Greece," after all.

Before Opal can once again question if you're being serious, you get a notification from your SYLLADEX. Seems your co-player needs assistance.​

JOAN: Let's put a pin in that actually, Arlo needs to enter.
-
CA: On it.
CA: And I have a plan that should help us all.

You plop the ASTROTOP back onto your head and begin the process of starting the SBURB SERVER, connecting to Arlo's CLIENT, and trying to deploy the various PHERNALIA into his home without crushing anything. There's some higher-tier stuff in the PHERNALIA REGISTRY, but it costs all sorts of grist you don't have access to. During the process you attempt to prototype his KERNELSPRITE with a simple sheet of ORIGAMI PAPER in hoping to game the system and apply paper's famous WEAKNESS ASPECT to your underlings, but you accidentally clicked the WHOLE SHELF instead of the paper on it, ripping the entire thing off the wall.

An errant, bird-laden CAGE falls into the kernel. Oops.​

CA: Oops.
-
JOAN: ... these controls are very bad.

 

[SerbianMounted]

==> Arlo: Enter

Your ENTERING SEQUENCE is by far more gradual and relaxed than your co-players. When Joan deploys the CRUXTRUDER your countdown reads at a full 8 HOURS and 27 MINUTES, so you're not exactly HARD PRESSED FOR TIME. You attend to your HUNGER before you attend to anything game related. Your apartment is ONE LEVEL ONLY, a penthouse suite at the top of your apartment complex. Your SISTER is a local music producer and talent agent, and thus can afford such lavish living conditions. You pour some of your favorite cereal, DONUT-Os. You're pretty sure they're more sugar than they are grain, but you figure it doesn't matter if you mind you diet since most of the portions of humanity that care about male body image are about to die.

Your LIVING ROOM which opens into your kitchen is decorated with all sorts of MUSIC ARTIST PARAPHERNALIA: gold records, busts of rappers and so on. The artists and their achievements, shared by your sister in her beneficiating them, have always taunted you. You would ask her to take them down, but you feel it improper and selfish. Why should your sister suffer just because you're miserable?

You flip on the T.V and stream some anime for a bit, eating your cereal while you read the closed captions. Planted firmly inbetween you and the TV is a GIANT TOTEM LATHE now, though. Eugh. Dammit Joan.

Evnetually, a giant GLOWING SEIZURE BALL bearing the face of your beloved parakeet inside of a cage floats in, sizzling and squawking like some kind of GLOWY FEATHERY ASSHOLE. You say sup, it squawks.

Dammit Joan.

==> Dammit Joan
​

GG: dammit joan
GG: what the hell did you do man?
GG: is that SONATA???
GG: dude
GG: you don't see me chucking tom into a toaster or whatever the hell, scrambling his DNA or whatever

 

[Eidolon Astronaut]

CA: It was an accident.
CA: Though if it's any consolation Euryale is a part of Opal's sprite now, and she seemed fine and still alive when I passed her by.
CA: I take it by that one cowboy-hat-wearing-imp that Orin has already entered safely?

 

[SerbianMounted]

GG: maaaaan, i'd be pissed if i wasn't at least a little amused
GG: i don't know how you mean 'fine' when i'm looking at a giant seizure ball
GG: i guess it wasn't like i was going to hear his melodies anytime soon anyways
GG: but that's whatever
GG: oh, uh, yeah
GG: haha, i kinda totally beefed that on my end too
GG: orin's fine, i just meant his sprite
GG: luckily he's too busy dodging scalding blasts of boiling water to talk to me
GG: ...man, i gotta stop saying shitty things
GG: i mean, well, in the right context i guess that didn't sound so shitty
GG: ....right?

You ponder for a second if that was indeed SHITTY or not while you inspect your new KERNELSPRITE. The ball flashes, and unbeknownst to you it squawks/tweets in a discordant GLITCH MELODY, unable to communicate with you as of yet. You tap it gently, and it just kind of....ambulates limblessly, which to it seems to come in the form of rotating like a sphere. You sigh, and pour yourself some Fruit Loops you got the recent craving for.

==>

Back on LOCAB Opal seems to be messing around in the distance. She's free of accosting amphibians, for the time being, and seems to be inspecting some of the trees in the distance. If you were BEING HER, which you are unable to be, you would understand better as to what she's inspecting and hoping to achieve. Looks like some budded flowers on the boughs, perhaps? Man, as a JUNIOR ARBOREAL ENTHUSIAST you have to wonder what's going on with the flora of this place.

==> Orin: Explore

You wander about your planet a bit. Unfortunately your conversation with Solas got cut short as she said she needed to attend to some PRESSING SHIT, whatever that may have meant. You figure out pretty fast that this world is pretty straightforward if painfully homogenous. Nothing on this world can really live or survive on the surface. Stepping out here is PRACTICALLY SUICIDE, and thusly you had to ALCHEMIZE SOME GEAR after slaying some imps to compensate.

You now don your DUSTER HAZMAT SUIT, prepping you for the intense heats of the surface which scorch most life alive in moments. Every second outside pressures your to trudge forward to the next, and there's no real space or room to linger or converse. You eventually DO find a small swathe of consorts that have camped out inside of a cave. They are a ragged pack of BLUE CROCODILES, huddled around in rags, half dead. You offer them some of your FOOD, and they devour it with wild abandon. They explain some lore to you as thanks for your mercy. In-between half exasperated nakking, that is.

Apparently, once, long ago, this world was beautiful and verdant, if young and immature, to the point that its possibility almost rivalled Skaia's. Until Yaldabaoth came. The Nakadiles lived peacefully together in nomadic, tribal societies, scavenging the land and deciding what could occur, but upon his arrival the angry, vengeful god scorched the air and made the planet so harsh, the population was decimated overnight. The Nakadiles now live, trying as they might to nak in quiet solitude, praying for a GREAT SAVIOR to come and save them from their fate.

Yaldabaoth unleashed 12 HORRORS unto the world, and these generals of his tyranny enforce his brutal reign. The consorts believe one day the PRINCE will come and vanquish the great DOOM that has befallen their world. Making them whole again and protecting them from the terrible threat that looms over all of them by beheading the god and extinguishing the HARSH SUN once and for all.

==> Be Opal

After that PROLONGED absence from your control of the narrative, the lens focuses on you once again as you trace your fingers over the budded cherry blossoms of this TREE. You noticed that it was odd this tree was still immature when you haven't seen ANY flora not in blooms around here. Your tracing got you somewhere, as you quickly realized that when you did, each bud PRODUCED A GLOW OF LIGHT. You quickly realized it was a puzzle, but got incredibly frustrated and almost gave up, as you SUCK AT PUZZLES. ​

 

[Eidolon Astronaut]

> Joan: Offer to help your friend.

You see Opal getting incredibly frustrated with what looks to be some kind of ARBOREAL PUZZLE.​

CA: We all have scalding blasts of boiling water we have to dodge in our lives.
CA: Orin's just happen to be literal right now and life threatening apparently.
CA: You shouldn't take it personally.
-
JOAN: Hey, are you alright over here?
JOAN: Do you need a hand?

 

[SerbianMounted]

GG: that first part wasn't actually me being passive aggressive
GG: i...actually like not having to do the awkward hassle of dancing around both our emotions

==>

You turn to Opal, who grunts in half frustration and half confusion. She flicks one of the bulbs as it glows in front of her, confounding her amateur sleuthing skills.
​

OPAL: how'd ya guess
OPAL: joan i fucking hate puzzles
OPAL: or maybe puzzles hate me?????
OPAL: that is totally possible
OPAL: go ahead and take a stab, i ain't getting anywhere with this anytime soon

Opal takes a step back and you examine the bulbs. As your friend had earlier, you observe that the BULBS of this tree produce different colored LIGHTS when they're touched. They fade after a small while, and in total there are SIX lights: in no particular order the bulbs lights produced are ORANGE RED BLUE GREEN and once more RED and GREEN. You input the OBVIOUS and arrange them either way in their order on the color spectrum, but it produces no result.

​