roleplay woes

[EmmaStarlight]

i have a problem rpn...


i want to rp so bad it hurts


but when someone asks me to i freeze up and make excuses for why i can't


i mean i totally freeze up like ice!


help?

 

[call me rae]

Ask people to roleplay yourself? Like find people with ideas you like and apply for the roleplay?


if the issue is with people asking you specifically.


if it's just a anxiety issue with talking period try to just hang out here or personal discussions and get to know some people well enough you don't feel awkward approaching the subject

 

[EmmaStarlight]

yes I have anxiety big time. i'm on meds for it.but the thing is I have an interest check so ppl PM me and either find i'm  not what they're looking for or I just make excuses why I can't rp. it's bad I WANT TO RP but......argh i'm a mess

 

[call me rae]

yes I have anxiety big time. i'm on meds for it.but the thing is I have an interest check so ppl PM me and either find i'm  not what they're looking for or I just make excuses why I can't rp. it's bad I WANT TO RP but......argh i'm a mess

If you have anxiety and are meds than it's likely you already have some tools for helping with this.


1. Take a deep breathe, walk away fro, the keyboard and do whatever you need to do to get over your first response. In fact never respond with your first instinct as that is likely to spawned by fear.


2.  Again don't start out with Roleplays ( especially groups ) that's a bit like trying to run before you can walk or throwing yourself into a crowded room with no prep. So start by making friends first. Talk to people in the personal discussion forum or here. Get to know people as friends before you put the added pressure on yourself to preform.


most people are on here at least as much to make friends as to write.


3. Remember it doesn't have to be perfect. If you make a mistake it's fine. Just take a deep breathe and remind yourself this is just for fun. 


4. I would put in your thread you have anxiety issues and your looking for someone who can be patient. I saw that often on another site when people had anxiety or depression. They would forewarn their partners so that they would know to be patient, or that if you randomly disappeared not to take it personally

 

[EmmaStarlight]

alright i'll do that now thank you rae

 

[Negative Zone]

Heyo, as a fellow anxiety haver I find rae's advice to be really good here.


Another thing I've noticed that might be good for you to keep in mind from my time lurking around, posting memes, etc is seeking roleplay is often a game of patience, especially for fandom players. I find that unless your fandom is the current big hotness (and even if it is), finding RPs might take a little (or a lot!) more time. After all you might find someone into your favorite fandom, but they might not be into your vision or what you're looking to RP. It's easy to take it personally, I've fallen into that trap a lot, but a great majority of the time it really isn't personal.


Forums are kind of a... what do I want to say... longer term investment? People come and go at their own pace. Your potential partner or group member might be totally swamped with IRL stuff right now, and a different mixture of users is browsing the forum at any given time. So I guess what I'm saying is my advice is to keep at it, bump your thread every day or so, and try not to take it personally if it takes a really long time to get a bite.


I know it's not easy. The first few hours or so after I post a search thread or PM someone asking for roleplay are basically *checks tab, hits f5, checks tab, oh no what if my post is The Worst and I turned everyone off?? did I weird this person out?? AAaaa*.

 

[恍如隔世]

Ah I can relate to this!