Roleplay Pet Peeves

[Brea The Brave]

I don't really get why every discussion about wanting more diversity in roleplays always get framed like we want to force people to stop playing cis/straight/white characters. I mean, surely people can complain about something without also forcing everyone to adhere to their will.

Also, on a side note, it kind of irks me that as soon as you talk about wanting more diversity the "let people play what they want" brigade comes marching in but everyone's fine with you talking about wanting more/less of, say, characters with edgy backstories.

Example the guy who inserts himself in your backstory to be your childhood friend or is you suffer from some kind of curse they magically know to fix all your problems making that aspect fonyiur character completely meaningless or the guy who played an edgy character who wanted my character to cheat on him so he could sulk more wand be suicidal over it despite my character not being that type of person. That is what I do not like.

Also while I can understand why it might irritate you when people come in and says "let people play what they want" when someone talks about diversity you also have to take into account how people are these days. There are people literally telling others they're a bigot if they aren't attracted to or willing to date trans people despite also agreeing that a person has preferences and being gay or bi or straight is not a choice yet will adamantly judge you about how it is your choice not to be attracted to trans people. I was called ablist the other day because I was joking with a friend of mine who I was clearly talking to and this random person just jumped into out conversation and started attacking me, saying I was talking about them and I constantly had to keep explaining to her clearly I was talking to my friend and not her but she persisted and I said sounded crazy and she called me an ableist because using the word crazy was discriminatory against people with mental health issues. I think it's knee jerk reaction because of how people behave when they bring up this subject a lot.

 

[Delinquent]

Gotta comment on this because edgy backstoies are different because gay people can be in (almost) any form of fiction but no yOU CANNOT BE THE SON OF THE DRAGON KING AND THE MOON ANGEL WHO WEILDS A DOUBLE EDGED SWORD MADE OUT OF SNAKES AND NOW YOUR OARENTS ARE DEAD DESPITE BEING GODS AND THAT BEING LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE AND YOU WERE RAISED BY WOLVES AND THEN HUMANS THIS IS A HIGH SCHOOL ROLEPLAY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!!! Also your character is overpowered.

I mean, that's a pretty specific example which ignores that it's 100% possible to be edgy without your character being out of place in the setting. So no, I don't see how it's different.

There are people literally telling others they're a bigot if they aren't attracted to or willing to date trans people despite also agreeing that a person has preferences and being gay or bi or straight is not a choice yet will adamantly judge you about how it is your choice not to be attracted to trans people. I was called ablist the other day because I was joking with a friend of mine who I was clearly talking to and this random person just jumped into out conversation and started attacking me, saying I was talking about them and I constantly had to keep explaining to her clearly I was talking to my friend and not her but she persisted and I said sounded crazy and she called me an ableist because using the word crazy was discriminatory against people with mental health issues. I think it's knee jerk reaction because of how people behave when they bring up this subject a lot.

And this is relevant to my point because?

 

[Bakuyoshi]

Look as one of the "Play what you want bridage" I personally do not care what you play. I play what I want. And what you play is YOUR decision not mine or anyone elses in this whole world.

 

[Delinquent]

Also while I can understand why it might irritate you when people come in and says "let people play what they want" when someone talks about diversity you also have to take into account how people are these days.

Also, it's the blatant hypocrisy that irritates me, not the argument itself. If the "let people play what they want" brigade showed up equally enthusiastically every time someone mentioned wanting more/less of a certain type of characters I wouldn't care. But it's the fact that they almost exclusively show up whenever someone mentions diversity that bugs me.

 

[Brea The Brave]

I mean, that's a pretty specific example which ignores that it's 100% possible to be edgy without your character being out of place in the setting. So no, I don't see how it's different.


And this is relevant to my point because?

Well let's see. As I said the way they worded it made it seem as if they were trying to tell other people what to play and that it was a problem if they happened to be cis and straight as a lot of people seem to do nowadays when talking about diversity and then label you as a bigot or problematic if you don't adhere to what they want. That is why it is relevant. I'm almost certain you could see that but you know what I'll give you the benefit of the doubt on this one.

 

[Nue]

Well let's see. As I said the way they worded it made it seems as if they were trying to tell other people what to play and that it was a problem if they happened to be cis and straight as a lot of people seem to do nowadays when talking about diversity and then label you as a bigot or problematic if you don't adhere to what they want. That is why it is relevant. I'm almost certain you could see that but you know what I'll give you the benefit of the doubt on this one.

As far as I can see even though this is a thread for things that annoy people in roleplays, it was made on the premise that these are all just opinions, not instructions or demands. I can see why the comment rustled feathers but not why it warrants a rant about unrelated things that other people are doing, if I'm honest? It's a tenuous link

 

[Brea The Brave]

Also, it's the blatant hypocrisy that irritates me, not the argument itself. If the "let people play what they want" brigade showed up equally enthusiastically every time someone mentioned wanting more/less of a certain type of characters I wouldn't care. But it's the fact that they almost exclusively show up whenever someone mentions diversity that bugs me.

Well as I pointed out before you don't have an issue where people playing edgy characters call you a bigot because your character just so happens to not be edgy so no one feels the need to say anything about it. Think about it. If someone came on here and said something like "I don't like when people play Latino characters" when you literally have racists in the world who hate Latino people, do you think people are more likely to say something about that or not liking edglords?

 

[BackSet]

I mean, that's a pretty specific example which ignores that it's 100% possible to be edgy without your character being out of place in the setting. So no, I don't see how it's different.

And that's not what I mean when I talk about Edgy Backstories(TM).

Of course, I guess Edgy Backstories(TM) is just too broad a term to use to describe what I mean. (Also you ignored my second example. Let me guess, "TL;R?")

What I mean is people who have edgy backstories who CONSTANTLY TALK ABOUT IT!!!

Pleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease talk about anything else but the fact that your parents and adopted parents are dead! Talk about anything else! What about sandwiches! I like sandwiches do you? (Side note: I would be just as angry is someone constantly talked about how straight/gay they are. Nobody cares bout your sexuality buddy).

Oh and I'm talking about characters here not real life people (though you shouldn't do either of those things in real life either. It isn't gonna net you any friends (oh and by the way, if your biological parents and adopted parents are actually dead in real life then I'm sorry for your loss. In an entirely not joking way.)

 

[Brea The Brave]

As far as I can see even though this is a thread for things that annoy people in roleplays, it was made on the premise that these are all just opinions, not instructions or demands. I can see why the comment rustled feathers but not why it warrants a rant about unrelated things that other people are doing, if I'm honest? It's a tenuous link

First of all it wasn't it rant and secondly it was not unrelated, I was explaining why people may have felt the need to say something when the subject of diversity comes up because of how people act these days about it as opposed to someone talking about a character being edgy. I would like to know how it was unrelated.

 

[BackSet]

From an objective pont of view: if you have to say something isn't a rant, it's a rant.

And yeah, that was a rant. You could also say tangent if you want a more positive connotation but that would technically be incorrect since it implies that it's unrelated (like this tangent right here) and off topic and you believe that it is related and on topic so... rant.

Also, dude, proofread your posts.

 

[Brea The Brave]

From an objective pont of view: if you have to say something isn't a rant, it's a rant.

And yeah, that was a rant. You could also say tangent if you want a more positive connotation but that would technically be incorrect since it implies that it's unrelated (like this tangent right here) and off topic and you believe that it is related and on topic so... rant.

Also, dude, proofread your posts.

To me a rant is when you are angry. I am not angry so I really don't see it as a rant, but you are free to see that way. Also I edited my post...so yeah.

 

[Nue]

First of all it wasn't it rant and secondly it was not unrelated, I was explaining why people may have fly the need to say something about it as opposed to someone talking about a character being edgy. I would like to know how it was unrelated.

It's mainly about the framing. Think about it like this: all the comment really said was "I want more diversity, I don't like seeing cis white characters all the time". You started talking about "how people are these days" and how people are forcing people to be attracted to trans ppl (which is a whole other can of worms) and then went into this story about how you got accused of ableism. The implication here is that what the original person said is somehow related to either of these issues just by virtue of them saying they want less samey characters when neither of these topics are actually all that related.

 

[holli]

from what i can tell, the reason that the "brigade" doesn't show up for other things is that the issue with stuff like edgy backstories and overused tropes is something that's been talked about for a super long time, so it seems almost redundant to kick up dust over it again? i think where we're all at now with internet rp culture, we know most people have a preference to avoid those characters. we know that, and it is a losing battle no matter who you intend to fight for. in a few years, this type of discussion will be equally as redundant because everyone will have already said everything there is to say across every platform each year prior! these specific things about characters are, right now, a hot topic in rp communities. everybody's talking about it because it's just what's relevant at the moment! see, i'm REALLY excited that people are playing different types of characters on a wider scale. i've been in different rp communities for well over a decade at this point, and i can remember a time at which almost nobody had gay characters, for example. because that sort of thing is no longer super uncommon and is becoming the 'norm' (which isn't a bad thing!), it's a point of discussion as the GENERAL roleplay culture continues to shift in a new direction. times are changing! in five years, maybe the hot topic will be warrior cats discourse again LOL

 

[Delinquent]

Well let's see. As I said the way they worded it made it seems as if they were trying to tell other people what to play and that it was a problem if they happened to be cis and straight as a lot of people seem to do nowadays when talking about diversity and then label you as a bigot or problematic if you don't adhere to what they want

What N Nue said.

(Also you ignored my second example. Let me guess, "TL;R?")

No, it would just be me repeating my overall point so I thought it'd be unnecessary to address it. But if that's what you want I can address it now, "I mean, that's a pretty specific example which ignores that it's 100% possible to be edgy whilst still interacting with other characters. So no, I don't see how it's different."

And that's not what I mean when I talk about Edgy Backstories(TM).

But not everyone is using your definition of edgy backstories.

 

[Brea The Brave]

It's mainly about the framing. Think about it like this: all the comment really said was "I want more diversity, I don't like seeing cis white characters all the time". You started talking about "how people are these days" and how people are forcing people to be attracted to trans ppl (which is a whole other can of worms) and then went into this story about how you got accused of ableism. The implication here is that what the original person said is somehow related to either of these issues just by virtue of them saying they want less samey characters when neither of these topics are actually all that related.

Well think about this way, the way it was worded can come off as the same as those people who also say they don't like seeing cis white characters in media all the time and if they don't get their way they then some of them proceed to call the creators of the show bigots and problematic. I was saying that the way they worded it, can set off warning bells in people's heads. It's not like I haven't seen it happen, the point is that people can see it as something that could lead into that kind of situation if they don't say something about it. It's a comment that can cause people to worry because of how it sounds and be accused of being something when you're not over simple stuff.

 

[BackSet]

But not everyone is using your definition of edgy backstories.

Oh for the love of god I literally just explained what I mean and why Edgy Backstory(TM(look, it's a required joke)) is too broad a term and got down to brass tacks.

...

Oh look, here we go again. This is gonna go on for a while.

Good thing I don't quite care at the moment. I'll care later but right now, meh.

 

[Nue]

Well think about this way, the way it was worded can come off as the same as those people who alps say they don't like seeing cis white characters in media all the time and if they don't get their way they then proceed to call the creators of the show bigots and problematic. I was saying that they way they worded it, can set off warning bells in people's heads. It's not like I haven't seen it happen, the point is that people can see it as something that could lead into the kind of situation if they don't say something about it. It's comment that can cause people to worry because of how it sounds.

I think we're maybe just not going to see eye to eye on this particular thing, because I happen to think the whole "people are harassing showrunners for having white characters" is huuuugely over exagerrated and blown out of proportion and normally it's just people on Twitter saying "man I wish x show had a more diverse cast". I also think it's necessary to note you can still like something while criticsing problematic elements of it, and I think people often misunderstand that as people trying to shut the whole thing down.

 

[Brea The Brave]

I think we're maybe just not going to see eye to eye on this particular thing, because I happen to think the whole "people are harassing showrunners for having white characters" is huuuugely over exagerrated and blown out of proportion and normally it's just people on Twitter saying "man I wish x show had a more diverse cast". I also think it's necessary to note you can still like something while criticsing problematic elements of it, and I think people often misunderstand that as people trying to shut the whole thing down.

I said some people some meaning it is not all of them, it doesn't even mean it's a large number of them, but they exist, just like you don't just see a bunch of racists huddled together on the street but you'd still probably feel the need to say something about it if someone said something that came off as racist by how it is worded. That is all I said to them really was that it came off as kind of discriminatory. I didn't say they were being discriminatory I was almost certain they weren't, but I did express that it could come off that way.

 

[BackSet]

I so blame myself for this.

 

[Nue]

I said some people some meaning it is not all of them, it doesn't even mean it's a large number of them, but they exist, just like you don't just see a bunch of racists huddled together on the street but you'd still probably feel the need to say something about it if someone said something that came off as racist by how it is worded. That is all I said to them really was that it came off as kind of discriminatory. I didn't say they were being discriminatory I was almost certain they weren't, but I did express that it could come off that way.

That kiiind of makes sense but imo just further highlights how off topic the stuff you said was and how it blew things out of proportion. You didn't think they were actually bigoted, and the group of people you compared to them are so small in numbers that it's arguable that they even exist - so making a post comparing what they said to this possibly ficticious group of people because it *maybe* could be interpreted that way - it just doesn't make sense? And accidentally implied what they said was on the same level as the other stuff that "those types of people" do.

I'm hoping I haven't burned any bridges here because I'm not like, genuinely angry with anyone I've debated about this with here - I just think people were maybe being unfair and blowing this stuff out of proportion. I don't even fully agree with the original comment; I happen to think there's a lot of diversity in roleplaying already, but a lot of people seemed to be putting words in their mouth that just wasn't part of their original post and I didn't wanna just leave it.

 

[BackSet]

So...

I don't like people who get offended when one character trash talks their character because dude it's not like I personally was insukting your character it was just my character doing what my character is gonna do normally. And I didn't mean it in an offense to you either I don't think you're stupid but my character think's that your character is stupid but ut'll all get smoothed out cause character development, right?

 

[DapperCat]

So...

I don't like people who get offended when one character trash talks their character because dude it's not like I personally was insukting your character it was just my character doing what my character is gonna do normally. And I didn't mean it in an offense to you either I don't think you're stupid but my character think's that your character is stupid but ut'll all get smoothed out cause character development, right?

That is way too recognisable. I have one char who is just generally a bitch, and she made a 'where's your dad with you dressing like this?' comment. They got super offended and told me they don't have a dad IRL and I'm like 'yeah I don't either this was my character talking to yours not me talking to you ._. .'

It used to make me feel guilty, but now I just go 'wat'. xD

 

[rae2nerdy]

I think the problem is that it's hard to infer tone on the internet. And some people just have a particularly blunt way of talking that can rub others the wrong way. I get that a lot actually. I am told I come across as overbearing or bitchy. It's never my intention it's just how I speak.

I personally thought the original comment was pretty inoffensive pet peeve list. But that's just my personal opinion and I can see how it would make other people defensive. Especially if they saw it as an attack on them or their way of roleplaying.

But at this point I'd say we've rather beaten this dead horse into the ground.


So in the spirit of moving us on I will say a recent peeve I've run into that I'm fairly sure we can all agree on is reading comprehension (I can't think of a better word sorry). Where a person either acts like all your ideas are their own OR they ignore you completely.

Like you could say - "Hey let's set the roleplay in Phoenix Arizona"

And their response is either "Where you do you want to set the roleplay?" or "I know let's have the roleplay set in Phoenix Arizona"

Like dude??? Ugh. I've had a few partners do similar things and it makes me want to throw my computer.

 

[Brea The Brave]

That kiiind of makes sense but imo just further highlights how off topic the stuff you said was and how it blew things out of proportion. You didn't think they were actually bigoted, and the group of people you compared to them are so small in numbers that it's arguable that they even exist - so making a post comparing what they said to this possibly ficticious group of people because it *maybe* could be interpreted that way - it just doesn't make sense? And accidentally implied what they said was on the same level as the other stuff that "those types of people" do.

I'm hoping I haven't burned any bridges here because I'm not like, genuinely angry with anyone I've debated about this with here - I just think people were maybe being unfair and blowing this stuff out of proportion. I don't even fully agree with the original comment; I happen to think there's a lot of diversity in roleplaying already, but a lot of people seemed to be putting words in their mouth that just wasn't part of their original post and I didn't wanna just leave it.

Well they are far from fictitious because I have had encounters with them many times. I never blew what they said out of proportion of compared it to what those select few people do merely said that it could be taken that way and could be a reason that people feel the need to say something about it as opposed to edglord characters. All I said to them was that it came off discriminatory and basically that maybe they needed to use context to avoid confusion or confrontation especially when one uses words like cookie cutter to describe white cis characters it can sound like you're saying that characters who are white and cis can't be interesting. I never once said what they said was on the level of what happened to me but other peoole have witnessed or had such experiences and I said this is what may have been running through their mind when they decided to speak on it.

Also no I am not angry and no bridges have not been burnt.

 

[BackSet]

That is way too recognisable. I have one char who is just generally a bitch, and she made a 'where's your dad with you dressing like this?' comment. They got super offended and told me they don't have a dad IRL and I'm like 'yeah I don't either this was my character talking to yours not me talking to you ._. .'

It used to make me feel guilty, but now I just go 'wat'. xD

My biggest problem is that I myself used to do that and now whenever someone does it I look at them as if they're young me meaning I look at them and loath them with a large degree of loathing equal to the degree of self-loathing I use to self-loath young me for this transgression.