The One Eyed Bandit
rotworm
Audacity was in equal parts a bane and boon, they'd always thought.
Whilst the ruckus of quill scribbling against paper would have long since quieted by now, and the gentle glow of brightlight would only be gracing a scant few desks, tonight the Translator's guild bustled with life. Many a Doll, some who'd stayed late and some who'd been called in specifically for the occasion, busied themselves with the gargantuan task at hand. Sheaf after sheaf of paper was scrawled upon, each with the same passage.
"Are you really sure all this is necessary?" To the chagrin of some of the more particular scribes, a gentle voice pierced the orchestra of paper and ink. Through the centre of the hall, two figures paced. At the lead was a Doll of medium frame, their visage a careful mixture of ancient and refurbished wood; at their heels, towered a Ragdoll whom at this point seemed to be comprised more of stitches than plush, sporting a jovial gait that would've almost been cute if not for their obvious veterancy.
"Absolutely! Certainly! Mostly." The hulking figure joked, even further disrupting the gentle flow with which some of the scribes worked. "Desperate times call for desperate measures, no? And most of this is on my dime, anyway! You should be happy for the service." As if to convince the other Doll, they clapped the pad of their hand against their back, though it hardly caused them to budge an inch.
The wooden Doll shot them a quizzical look, which quickly turned to one of apology when they spied the gazes of contempt being shot at them from the other inhabitants of the room.
"Fine, fine... Though I don't really see why you're so possessed with gravitas. Times have surely been slow, but..." They began to speak, before their voice trailed off into a mix of indistinguishable mumbles. If they had nails to chew, at that moment they surely would have.
"Eh? Don't worry too much about it, old chap. Call it a gut feeling!" The larger Doll attempted to reassure them, though they weren't entirely sure what exactly a gut was.
"Mmm... I'll do my best." They mumbled a halfhearted response, this time just barely audible. At that, the two Dolls' pace slowed to a stop, a towering pile of neatly stacked letters laying in front of them. Neither of them was quite sure how many there were, but both were confident that it would be enough to serve their purposes.
"Actually, now that I'm looking at them, do we even have this many Dolls on the mailing list?" The Ragdoll wondered aloud, earning them yet another wave of spite from the still hard-at-work scribes. The other Doll cringed. If both of them made it to the next day without having to sit through a few dozen complaints, it'd be more than a miracle. They considered making a public apology to the scribes they'd employed, but somehow they had a feeling that the act would only be considered a mark against their pride.
Stowing away the thought for now, the smaller doll reached out and took up one of the letters in hand. Methodically, they scanned the message, going over its contents for the nth time before heaving a heavy, tired sigh. It wasn't clear, it wasn't concise, and to be frank, they had more complaints about it then they could ever hope to list, but they knew that there was no stopping it now.
If just having these written was going to be this exhausting, the matter they discussed might have just been enough to kill them.
Even worse than that, were the guests.
Day after day, from noon until closing, all manner of Doll wandered through the Hall's front doors in a volume not seen since the organization's golden age. Like the letters, though, most of them were useless. Fortune-seeking neonates or bored nobles who seemed to be treating the invitation as one to an odd party, waltzing into the building with the expectation of some sort of swashbuckling adventure. The odd heckler, even, dared to make a nuisance of themselves, either complaining at or making a mockery of the Guild's members until they were inevitably shooed out.
Looking out over it all was the wooden Doll from the Translator's Guild Hall those few months ago, feeling confident that if they had a heart, it'd be attacking them right about now. Nestled snugly beside a half-empty pint of bug brew, profiles of the day's batch of hopeful-looking responders sat neatly atop their desk. They'd shuffled through them more than once now, and an equal amount of times had come to the conclusion that they seemed to be a particularly promising lot. A few of the names were even familiar, though they were from a time before his own.
Tentatively, their gaze flicked between a mechanism atop their desk, and the narrow window that allowed them to peak into the hall beyond their office. They could make out the silhouettes of a few of their guests, their distinct shapes and sizes doing little to hide their presence. For a moment, they thumbed around with the idea of a face-to-door appointment, but decided against it when they imagined the sorts of rumours that would spread.
Really now, the head of the Scholar's Guild hiding from interviewees? Forget about their own reputation, the Guild itself would be a laughing stock for years.
Willing themself forward, the timid doll braced themselves and pushed harshly down upon the mechanism. At their press, the device whirred to life, pulling an attached string taut and sending a wave of movement along its length. In the hall outside, a network of wooden chimes jingled in response from above, a signal for the visitors below to guide themselves into the Head Scholar's office.
Whilst the ruckus of quill scribbling against paper would have long since quieted by now, and the gentle glow of brightlight would only be gracing a scant few desks, tonight the Translator's guild bustled with life. Many a Doll, some who'd stayed late and some who'd been called in specifically for the occasion, busied themselves with the gargantuan task at hand. Sheaf after sheaf of paper was scrawled upon, each with the same passage.
"Are you really sure all this is necessary?" To the chagrin of some of the more particular scribes, a gentle voice pierced the orchestra of paper and ink. Through the centre of the hall, two figures paced. At the lead was a Doll of medium frame, their visage a careful mixture of ancient and refurbished wood; at their heels, towered a Ragdoll whom at this point seemed to be comprised more of stitches than plush, sporting a jovial gait that would've almost been cute if not for their obvious veterancy.
"Absolutely! Certainly! Mostly." The hulking figure joked, even further disrupting the gentle flow with which some of the scribes worked. "Desperate times call for desperate measures, no? And most of this is on my dime, anyway! You should be happy for the service." As if to convince the other Doll, they clapped the pad of their hand against their back, though it hardly caused them to budge an inch.
The wooden Doll shot them a quizzical look, which quickly turned to one of apology when they spied the gazes of contempt being shot at them from the other inhabitants of the room.
"Fine, fine... Though I don't really see why you're so possessed with gravitas. Times have surely been slow, but..." They began to speak, before their voice trailed off into a mix of indistinguishable mumbles. If they had nails to chew, at that moment they surely would have.
"Eh? Don't worry too much about it, old chap. Call it a gut feeling!" The larger Doll attempted to reassure them, though they weren't entirely sure what exactly a gut was.
"Mmm... I'll do my best." They mumbled a halfhearted response, this time just barely audible. At that, the two Dolls' pace slowed to a stop, a towering pile of neatly stacked letters laying in front of them. Neither of them was quite sure how many there were, but both were confident that it would be enough to serve their purposes.
"Actually, now that I'm looking at them, do we even have this many Dolls on the mailing list?" The Ragdoll wondered aloud, earning them yet another wave of spite from the still hard-at-work scribes. The other Doll cringed. If both of them made it to the next day without having to sit through a few dozen complaints, it'd be more than a miracle. They considered making a public apology to the scribes they'd employed, but somehow they had a feeling that the act would only be considered a mark against their pride.
Stowing away the thought for now, the smaller doll reached out and took up one of the letters in hand. Methodically, they scanned the message, going over its contents for the nth time before heaving a heavy, tired sigh. It wasn't clear, it wasn't concise, and to be frank, they had more complaints about it then they could ever hope to list, but they knew that there was no stopping it now.
If just having these written was going to be this exhausting, the matter they discussed might have just been enough to kill them.
To whom it way concern,
Good day, and I hope this finds you in good health. Today I, Professor James, Ninth
Head Scholar, write to you in invitation and plea. We of the Scholar's Guild
are in dire need. Our numbers dwindle, yet our work towers higher than
ever. So, I ask, will you not come to our side?
Be you old blood or new, I beseech thee! Come! To our side for the quest for truth!
And if such a lofty ideal is beyond you, then worry not. Fame, glory, riches
and more, all will be within your grasp too! All you need do to pay the
Scholar's Guild a visit, between the beginning months of the coming year.
Looking forward to your visit,
The Ninth Head Scholar, The Magnanimous Professor
Months later...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As it had been for the better half of the past month, the Scholar's Guild was currently in a state of chaos. With every morning, came a new stack of letters, each needing to be sorted and read through by the scant administrative staff available. The vast majority of them were complaints, which only served to thicken the ever-present atmosphere of stress that had recently claimed the dilapidated guilf hall as its home. At the same time, just enough of the incoming mail was of important enough note to prevent the frustrated staffers from giving up entirely, forcing them to drudge through the constant downpour of inky grievances.Good day, and I hope this finds you in good health. Today I, Professor James, Ninth
Head Scholar, write to you in invitation and plea. We of the Scholar's Guild
are in dire need. Our numbers dwindle, yet our work towers higher than
ever. So, I ask, will you not come to our side?
Be you old blood or new, I beseech thee! Come! To our side for the quest for truth!
And if such a lofty ideal is beyond you, then worry not. Fame, glory, riches
and more, all will be within your grasp too! All you need do to pay the
Scholar's Guild a visit, between the beginning months of the coming year.
Looking forward to your visit,
The Ninth Head Scholar, The Magnanimous Professor
Months later...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Even worse than that, were the guests.
Day after day, from noon until closing, all manner of Doll wandered through the Hall's front doors in a volume not seen since the organization's golden age. Like the letters, though, most of them were useless. Fortune-seeking neonates or bored nobles who seemed to be treating the invitation as one to an odd party, waltzing into the building with the expectation of some sort of swashbuckling adventure. The odd heckler, even, dared to make a nuisance of themselves, either complaining at or making a mockery of the Guild's members until they were inevitably shooed out.
Looking out over it all was the wooden Doll from the Translator's Guild Hall those few months ago, feeling confident that if they had a heart, it'd be attacking them right about now. Nestled snugly beside a half-empty pint of bug brew, profiles of the day's batch of hopeful-looking responders sat neatly atop their desk. They'd shuffled through them more than once now, and an equal amount of times had come to the conclusion that they seemed to be a particularly promising lot. A few of the names were even familiar, though they were from a time before his own.
Tentatively, their gaze flicked between a mechanism atop their desk, and the narrow window that allowed them to peak into the hall beyond their office. They could make out the silhouettes of a few of their guests, their distinct shapes and sizes doing little to hide their presence. For a moment, they thumbed around with the idea of a face-to-door appointment, but decided against it when they imagined the sorts of rumours that would spread.
Really now, the head of the Scholar's Guild hiding from interviewees? Forget about their own reputation, the Guild itself would be a laughing stock for years.
Willing themself forward, the timid doll braced themselves and pushed harshly down upon the mechanism. At their press, the device whirred to life, pulling an attached string taut and sending a wave of movement along its length. In the hall outside, a network of wooden chimes jingled in response from above, a signal for the visitors below to guide themselves into the Head Scholar's office.