Walliver
Two Thousand Club
- One on One
- Group

The town of Blackgrove was not often visited by misfortune. It was quiet and undisturbed by the plagues of city life. Or, at least, that was the lie the town sold. In reality, it was filled to the brim with corruption and lies. The recent murder of Darren Russell set this lying town on edge. School was on reduced hours and a curfew was put out. The vice mayor- Darren’s father- refused to make a statement, though the mayor herself stressed the need for so called “privacy.”
Lurch had a secret of his own: how to get annoying customers to shut up and pay. A simple cry of, “get Lurch,” and most customers immediately clammed up and left. He was an intimidating presence around the coffee shop- to the customers and new hires at least. His silence and stature were a bit overwhelming for anyone, especially people who knew they weren’t doing the right thing.
Imagine this:
You- possibly a middle-aged woman named Karen or Deborah- are yelling at a teenage barista for adding two pumps of French vanilla instead of two pumps of sugar-free vanilla. It’s an honest mistake, but your brain can’t handle the existence of such a thing. The new hire quivers beneath your harpy screech, as all people are supposed to do. Another barista sees this and calls for a “Lurch.” Your mind brings up, perhaps, the Addams Family character. The man that walks out of the back rooms is nothing short of it.
He is impossibly tall- why is this kid not playing professional basketball? His face and frame are skeletal, all sharp edges. He is silent as he slinks from behind the counter to face you. He has to lean down quite a bit to meet your eyes- which he does with a deliberateness that makes your knees knock together. He opens his mouth to speak, and a voice like your worst nightmare graces your ears.
“Pay and leave.”
Ok, you can stop imagining now.
Lurch was the beloved manager of Blackgrove’s very own Java Joe’s. He was rarely ever the center of attention, and that was the way he preferred things. Unfortunately, since Darren Russell had once been an employee at Java Joe’s- a part time summertime employee at that- the gossipers of the town were quick to jump on him.
“When did you last hear from Darren?”
“Were there any warnings that something was going to happen to him?”
“Did he have any enemies?”
“Is the 2 for 1 special only on scones or can I add in a croissant?”
Lurch grumbled and moved back behind the counter. Just another day in Blackgrove.