Other Grief and Grieving

[KeirenReine]

So, tomorrow is the one year Anniversary of my Brother's death. I have 3 brothers, 2 are half, even to each other and then there is my one full blooded brother. He died a whole year ago tomorrow (June 7th). It's been a rough year as well 2019-2020 since then. We couldn't celebrate Thanksgiving the same (Canadian one), or his birthday or Christmas. Though for Christmas dinner the family got together and we made a toast to him. But since the whole Rona fiasco here I am left with my thoughts more often than not also cause I live alone. Plus the past week and this full moon bs is making me weepy and emotional anyway. But yeah, grieving now too on top of that. Fun.

My brother was special needs, so we knew he was not going to outlive us anyway. We just didn't expect it as soon. His body began the decline a few years ago though, being more feeble and breakable. He was in a wheelchair and could only walk if someone was behind him etc, or a walker but still someone behind. He wouldn't walk on his own. But he started getting seizures last year and a case of pneumonia that sent him to the hospital April 7th. Exactly 2 months later, still in the hospital, he passed. He was 28, which itself is a tragic number for Celebrity deaths as well.

Our family is also a bit messed up so we are still going through things with that as well. We all need counselling I swear, but most of us do not have that. My mother is mentally ill, but also a very Toxic person. It really showed this time last year as well.

Anyway, So yeah this time of month is super fun right now *sarcasm*
Anyone else want to get things off their chest and share experiences?

 

[dirt]

So, tomorrow is the one year Anniversary of my Brother's death. I have 3 brothers, 2 are half, even to each other and then there is my one full blooded brother. He died a whole year ago tomorrow (June 7th). It's been a rough year as well 2019-2020 since then. We couldn't celebrate Thanksgiving the same (Canadian one), or his birthday or Christmas. Though for Christmas dinner the family got together and we made a toast to him. But since the whole Rona fiasco here I am left with my thoughts more often than not also cause I live alone. Plus the past week and this full moon bs is making me weepy and emotional anyway. But yeah, grieving now too on top of that. Fun.

My brother was special needs, so we knew he was not going to outlive us anyway. We just didn't expect it as soon. His body began the decline a few years ago though, being more feeble and breakable. He was in a wheelchair and could only walk if someone was behind him etc, or a walker but still someone behind. He wouldn't walk on his own. But he started getting seizures last year and a case of pneumonia that sent him to the hospital April 7th. Exactly 2 months later, still in the hospital, he passed. He was 28, which itself is a tragic number for Celebrity deaths as well.

Our family is also a bit messed up so we are still going through things with that as well. We all need counselling I swear, but most of us do not have that. My mother is mentally ill, but also a very Toxic person. It really showed this time last year as well.

Anyway, So yeah this time of month is super fun right now *sarcasm*
Anyone else want to get things off their chest and share experiences?

I'm so sorry. If you need anybody to talk to, I'm right here. You may not know me, but I'm still right here for you.

 

[KeirenReine]

I'm so sorry. If you need anybody to talk to, I'm right here. You may not know me, but I'm still right here for you.

Thanks, Though right now venting in words is the best way for me as an overly sensitive empath as it is ahaha. Talking things out irl etc makes it so much worse for me. Plus spending an hour+ bawling has exhausted it for now.

 

[Tamriel]

I'm so sorry! I wish the best for you and your family.

 

[tacenda]

Knowing that every stranger you pass has shit like this going on is comforting for some reason. You're going to be okay. I'm sorry that you feel your family is broken and that you lost your brother Keep reaching out to people even if you're tired of it. You've got this : ) My DMs are open.
This isn't close to the gravity of your situation, but about half a year one of my two cats was diagnosed with FIP, a disease which most cats die from within a year. He's very energetic and has an attitude, so picturing him weak in a vet and being put down while I hold him breaks me.

 

[Skulloco]

It's easy for the mind to feel like reality is ripping itself apart, that you're lost and laying down doing nothing is all you want to do. It's important to remain active. Going for a walk, reading a book, cooking, whatever you prefer. Keep the mind in motion, anchored in reality, and grieving becomes less painful. Not saying it isn't necessary, I believe giving is necessary, but don't let it consume you. Remember your brother and the brilliant soul he was, smile and dance to express how lovely it was that you called him your brother. He lives on through your memories and stories you share.

Tacenda brings up an important point, too. "Keep reaching out to people". Don't hesitate to contact me if you want/need to get anything off your chest.