GojiBean
Your resident irradiated Kaiju King
"Ma'am, I need to see your ID please."
"O-oh! Of course! J-just... PleaseA A-a-a moment, please!"
A young woman with short cut brown hair frantically fiddled with the void within her purse as the security guard rolled his eyes and sighed.
"No rush, ma'am."
"O-oh! Yes! Just, a moment, please!"
Finally, she found her wallet, and gave a delighted, relieved smile as she opened it... And her smile vanished.
"Wh-... Where is it?"
She fingered through the various cards in the wallet, but no ID card could be located.
"I-I don't understand! I know I had it when I left the house! I checked! I swear!"
"Sorry, ma'am. No ID, no entry. Please step out of the line."
"But-"
"Ma'am. Please step out of the line." He said more sternly, pointing off to his right.
The young woman lowered her head and slowly walked in the direction he pointed. Meanwhile, the man behind her had watched with silent glee as he confidently stepped up to the security officer, pulled out his wallet, and held up his ID card.
"Very good, sir. You-"
"Excuse me, sir!" The next man in line said, as he pointed to the floor.
"That woman's ID fell out of this man's pocket! He must be a pick-pocket!"
The officer knelt down and picked up the ID card, and sure enough it belonged to the woman from before who was still walking slowly away.
"Hey! Detain this man!" The security officer ordered to a few of his colleagues who were standing nearby.
They did as ordered, and pulled the pick-pocket away to be searched for any other belongings that clearly were not his. But as he was dragged away, he let slip the tiniest of smirks as he glanced over his shoulder. He made eye contact with the woman, whose face was deadpan neutral, as she gave a subtle nod and re-donned the dejected look she'd carried earlier.
"Ma'am!" The security officer called as he jogged over to her.
"Ma'am. It seems that man behind you picked your purse while you were in line. Your ID fell out of his pocket." He said as he handed it to her, to which she let a large smile cross her lips.
"S-so! I can go in now?"
"Yes, ma'am. You may enter the exhibit. Please do so in an orderly fashion."
"Of course! Thank you so much!"
She walked through the security checkpoint with a bright smile, and rounded the corner of the hall before letting her smile disappear.
"It's far, far too easy nowadays." She muttered.
Static emerged in her left ear from a tiny device planted in her ear canal.
Maybe you're just too skilled?
"A nice thought. But I feel sorry for whomever the head of security is here. He's going to be out of the job by the end of the day."
Damn straight. Now, according to our layouts you're about three rooms away from the target. Stay inconspicuous and-
"Keep up the bumbler façade. I know."
Music to my ears. I'm going radio silent until you find him.
She proceeded down the hall to the women's bathroom, and slipped into one of the stalls. Using speed like that which you'd see at a quick change magic show, she slipped out of her civilian clothing and into an all-black personal security uniform, complete with an ID badge belonging to the target's security-for-hire company, and ditched her old outfit and wig in the trash, burying it beneath a host of crumpled paper towels so it wouldn't be noticed. Donning her reflective sunglasses, and slipping on a fake wedding ring onto her ring finger to complete the ensemble, she removed a clip from her golden brown hair to allow it fall behind her in its classic ponytail style.
Exiting the bathroom, she walked the halls until she found the room in question. The target, Tiger Mustafour, was an art and antiquities dealer wanted for questioning regarding accusations of having connections to a local human smuggling operation. And he was here at today's exhibit for the reveal of his latest acquisition. A famous sculpture by renowned artist Leopold Von Hrestmon. Its estimated value was 2 million Dalcs, making it the third highest earning commission in the last decade. And today was its unveiling at this exhibit.
Slipping around the crowd, she made her way around to one of the other personal security guards in a matching uniform.
"Who are you?" He asked quietly.
The device in her ear crackled to life.
They put in a call for backup about twelve minutes ago.
"Backup. Just arrived. More on the way." She whispered back, taking up a matching posture to his with her hands behind her back.
"Ah. Excellent. All's good here, so far."
She nodded in approval.
The reveal of the piece went off as planned, and two other guards arrived shortly thereafter to confirm they were called in as backup as well. She greeted them cordially, and they all exited the back of the building with the target and escorted him to the sidewalk as a limousine pulled up to the curb.
"A limousine? Where's my normal vehicle?" Tiger demanded haughtily.
We spiked the tires of his usual ride which we confirmed is in for service. This is a temporary replacement. Driver's one of us.
"A replacement, sir. It seems your initial vehicle ran into tire issues and is currently returning for service."
"What!?" He screamed as he pulled out his phone.
"Where are you?! Where's my-... You drove over some metal debris in the road you didn't see and popped your tires?! You incompetent buffoon!! That's my favorite ride!! For your sake, you better pray it's just the tires that were damaged!!"
He hung up the phone and threw open the limo door and got inside grumbling to himself. She entered the limo and sat across from him while the others closed the door and they drove away.
"This is ridiculous! This is such a pedestrian mode of transportation! I deserve better!" He grumbled, eying the female security officer up and down and offering her a rather sickening smile. "Don't you agree?"
They're paid to kiss up to him. So start kissing.
"Of course, sir. It's nothing short of a travesty that we must soil your clothing on such cheap material." She said as she dragged her hand across the fine leather seat beneath her.
"Absolutely."
He was silent for a moment, but rested his chin in his hand.
"I don't think I recognize you. New, perhaps?"
"Yes, sir. It's my first job."
"Hmph. Well, at least you're behaving more appropriately than the usual bumpkins they send to "guard" me."
"I appreciate your praise, sir."
His sickening smile returned.
"I don't suppose you know what happens in these vehicles, sometimes?"
"Sir?"
Careful, Luna.
"I hear that these limousines, with their tinted windows, make excellent love-making transportation. Would you agree with the assessment?" He asked, eyeing her up and down again as a subtle bulge appeared in his pants.
Eeeeeeasy, Luna.
"I can't say I have an opinion on the matter, sir. I'm happily married." She said as she tapped her left ring finger to show the wedding band.
"Ah, but doesn't that just make it more exciting?" He asked as he got up from his seat and moved to go sit right next to her, hip to him, and his chest up against her shoulder as his left hand came to rest on her thigh.
Oh, no.
"Sir, I must ask that you distance yourself from me."
"That just makes me want this even more. Now, strip. That's an order." He said with a subtle growl as he tried to lean in close to lick her neck.
In a flash he was upside down and slammed onto the floor of the limo and a fist was the last thing he remembered seeing before he blacked out.
... You okay there, Luna?
"I'm fine." She said as she sat back in her seat and removed the sunglasses.
"Target secured, obviously. Tell me I get that week break HQ promised me now."
Uh... Unfortunately, they rescinded it.
"... Excuse me?"
A priority target was just sighted, and an opportunity presented itself that they couldn't ignore. You've been assigned to it.
"Sigh..."
I know. I know. Look, once this job's over I'll make sure you get two weeks. Promise.
"A month."
A MONTH!?! C'mon Luna! Two weeks is all I'd be able to get for anyone!
"A month, Vic. I've been working non-stop for the last two years. I need a real break. Not what amounts to a coffee break compared to what I've been putting myself through for these old yahoos."
I'll see what I can do. But no promises.
"Fine. What are the details?" She asked as she started slipping out of the security uniform into something more comfortable.
Well, how to put this?... Hmm...
"Spit it out, Vic."
Yeah. Details. Target is the chancellor of the rather prestigious Fheraldo Youth Academy. He's also the leader of a local crime ring engaged in everything from petty theft to human trafficking. But we've never been able to pin him down or get the hard evidence we need to go after him since he's found a way to keep his hands squeaky clean on the outside.
"Easy enough."
Well, hold on there. I wasn't done. The method for actually finding this guy requires you to uh... Get married and have a kid.
". . . . . EXCUSE ME?!"
In two weeks.
"You-"
She froze.
"Two weeks?"
Two weeks. The entrance ceremony is in 15 days, and they're allowing applications up to the day before. But both mother and father must be present for it, along with the kid. So you have two weeks to get married and have a kid.
"You know what "having a kid" entails, right?"
Adoption?
"... I hate you."
Haha! Well, look. Adoption's the easy part. We've already fabricated your background to be ideal for taking a kid in from just about any orphanage you want to visit. It's finding a husband that's gonna be the hard part. We'd use one of our operatives, but they've all either got missions of their own or have been recently arrested for suspicion of being spies because they're single and living in couple-infested areas.
"Poor things."
No kidding. Anyway, hop to it kiddo!
"Two months."
Good luck, Luna.
The device went silent, and she removed it from her ear canal and put it in her coat pocket.
... She sat in silence for a long time before releasing a sigh.
"Right. Find a husband, adopt a child... In two weeks."
She looked out the window at the couples walking the streets in the city as it moved by.
"Am I supposed to kidnap a husband? Cause right now that seems like the only realistic option."
"O-oh! Of course! J-just... PleaseA A-a-a moment, please!"
A young woman with short cut brown hair frantically fiddled with the void within her purse as the security guard rolled his eyes and sighed.
"No rush, ma'am."
"O-oh! Yes! Just, a moment, please!"
Finally, she found her wallet, and gave a delighted, relieved smile as she opened it... And her smile vanished.
"Wh-... Where is it?"
She fingered through the various cards in the wallet, but no ID card could be located.
"I-I don't understand! I know I had it when I left the house! I checked! I swear!"
"Sorry, ma'am. No ID, no entry. Please step out of the line."
"But-"
"Ma'am. Please step out of the line." He said more sternly, pointing off to his right.
The young woman lowered her head and slowly walked in the direction he pointed. Meanwhile, the man behind her had watched with silent glee as he confidently stepped up to the security officer, pulled out his wallet, and held up his ID card.
"Very good, sir. You-"
"Excuse me, sir!" The next man in line said, as he pointed to the floor.
"That woman's ID fell out of this man's pocket! He must be a pick-pocket!"
The officer knelt down and picked up the ID card, and sure enough it belonged to the woman from before who was still walking slowly away.
"Hey! Detain this man!" The security officer ordered to a few of his colleagues who were standing nearby.
They did as ordered, and pulled the pick-pocket away to be searched for any other belongings that clearly were not his. But as he was dragged away, he let slip the tiniest of smirks as he glanced over his shoulder. He made eye contact with the woman, whose face was deadpan neutral, as she gave a subtle nod and re-donned the dejected look she'd carried earlier.
"Ma'am!" The security officer called as he jogged over to her.
"Ma'am. It seems that man behind you picked your purse while you were in line. Your ID fell out of his pocket." He said as he handed it to her, to which she let a large smile cross her lips.
"S-so! I can go in now?"
"Yes, ma'am. You may enter the exhibit. Please do so in an orderly fashion."
"Of course! Thank you so much!"
She walked through the security checkpoint with a bright smile, and rounded the corner of the hall before letting her smile disappear.
"It's far, far too easy nowadays." She muttered.
Static emerged in her left ear from a tiny device planted in her ear canal.
Maybe you're just too skilled?
"A nice thought. But I feel sorry for whomever the head of security is here. He's going to be out of the job by the end of the day."
Damn straight. Now, according to our layouts you're about three rooms away from the target. Stay inconspicuous and-
"Keep up the bumbler façade. I know."
Music to my ears. I'm going radio silent until you find him.
She proceeded down the hall to the women's bathroom, and slipped into one of the stalls. Using speed like that which you'd see at a quick change magic show, she slipped out of her civilian clothing and into an all-black personal security uniform, complete with an ID badge belonging to the target's security-for-hire company, and ditched her old outfit and wig in the trash, burying it beneath a host of crumpled paper towels so it wouldn't be noticed. Donning her reflective sunglasses, and slipping on a fake wedding ring onto her ring finger to complete the ensemble, she removed a clip from her golden brown hair to allow it fall behind her in its classic ponytail style.
Exiting the bathroom, she walked the halls until she found the room in question. The target, Tiger Mustafour, was an art and antiquities dealer wanted for questioning regarding accusations of having connections to a local human smuggling operation. And he was here at today's exhibit for the reveal of his latest acquisition. A famous sculpture by renowned artist Leopold Von Hrestmon. Its estimated value was 2 million Dalcs, making it the third highest earning commission in the last decade. And today was its unveiling at this exhibit.
Slipping around the crowd, she made her way around to one of the other personal security guards in a matching uniform.
"Who are you?" He asked quietly.
The device in her ear crackled to life.
They put in a call for backup about twelve minutes ago.
"Backup. Just arrived. More on the way." She whispered back, taking up a matching posture to his with her hands behind her back.
"Ah. Excellent. All's good here, so far."
She nodded in approval.
The reveal of the piece went off as planned, and two other guards arrived shortly thereafter to confirm they were called in as backup as well. She greeted them cordially, and they all exited the back of the building with the target and escorted him to the sidewalk as a limousine pulled up to the curb.
"A limousine? Where's my normal vehicle?" Tiger demanded haughtily.
We spiked the tires of his usual ride which we confirmed is in for service. This is a temporary replacement. Driver's one of us.
"A replacement, sir. It seems your initial vehicle ran into tire issues and is currently returning for service."
"What!?" He screamed as he pulled out his phone.
"Where are you?! Where's my-... You drove over some metal debris in the road you didn't see and popped your tires?! You incompetent buffoon!! That's my favorite ride!! For your sake, you better pray it's just the tires that were damaged!!"
He hung up the phone and threw open the limo door and got inside grumbling to himself. She entered the limo and sat across from him while the others closed the door and they drove away.
"This is ridiculous! This is such a pedestrian mode of transportation! I deserve better!" He grumbled, eying the female security officer up and down and offering her a rather sickening smile. "Don't you agree?"
They're paid to kiss up to him. So start kissing.
"Of course, sir. It's nothing short of a travesty that we must soil your clothing on such cheap material." She said as she dragged her hand across the fine leather seat beneath her.
"Absolutely."
He was silent for a moment, but rested his chin in his hand.
"I don't think I recognize you. New, perhaps?"
"Yes, sir. It's my first job."
"Hmph. Well, at least you're behaving more appropriately than the usual bumpkins they send to "guard" me."
"I appreciate your praise, sir."
His sickening smile returned.
"I don't suppose you know what happens in these vehicles, sometimes?"
"Sir?"
Careful, Luna.
"I hear that these limousines, with their tinted windows, make excellent love-making transportation. Would you agree with the assessment?" He asked, eyeing her up and down again as a subtle bulge appeared in his pants.
Eeeeeeasy, Luna.
"I can't say I have an opinion on the matter, sir. I'm happily married." She said as she tapped her left ring finger to show the wedding band.
"Ah, but doesn't that just make it more exciting?" He asked as he got up from his seat and moved to go sit right next to her, hip to him, and his chest up against her shoulder as his left hand came to rest on her thigh.
Oh, no.
"Sir, I must ask that you distance yourself from me."
"That just makes me want this even more. Now, strip. That's an order." He said with a subtle growl as he tried to lean in close to lick her neck.
In a flash he was upside down and slammed onto the floor of the limo and a fist was the last thing he remembered seeing before he blacked out.
... You okay there, Luna?
"I'm fine." She said as she sat back in her seat and removed the sunglasses.
"Target secured, obviously. Tell me I get that week break HQ promised me now."
Uh... Unfortunately, they rescinded it.
"... Excuse me?"
A priority target was just sighted, and an opportunity presented itself that they couldn't ignore. You've been assigned to it.
"Sigh..."
I know. I know. Look, once this job's over I'll make sure you get two weeks. Promise.
"A month."
A MONTH!?! C'mon Luna! Two weeks is all I'd be able to get for anyone!
"A month, Vic. I've been working non-stop for the last two years. I need a real break. Not what amounts to a coffee break compared to what I've been putting myself through for these old yahoos."
I'll see what I can do. But no promises.
"Fine. What are the details?" She asked as she started slipping out of the security uniform into something more comfortable.
Well, how to put this?... Hmm...
"Spit it out, Vic."
Yeah. Details. Target is the chancellor of the rather prestigious Fheraldo Youth Academy. He's also the leader of a local crime ring engaged in everything from petty theft to human trafficking. But we've never been able to pin him down or get the hard evidence we need to go after him since he's found a way to keep his hands squeaky clean on the outside.
"Easy enough."
Well, hold on there. I wasn't done. The method for actually finding this guy requires you to uh... Get married and have a kid.
". . . . . EXCUSE ME?!"
In two weeks.
"You-"
She froze.
"Two weeks?"
Two weeks. The entrance ceremony is in 15 days, and they're allowing applications up to the day before. But both mother and father must be present for it, along with the kid. So you have two weeks to get married and have a kid.
"You know what "having a kid" entails, right?"
Adoption?
"... I hate you."
Haha! Well, look. Adoption's the easy part. We've already fabricated your background to be ideal for taking a kid in from just about any orphanage you want to visit. It's finding a husband that's gonna be the hard part. We'd use one of our operatives, but they've all either got missions of their own or have been recently arrested for suspicion of being spies because they're single and living in couple-infested areas.
"Poor things."
No kidding. Anyway, hop to it kiddo!
"Two months."
Good luck, Luna.
The device went silent, and she removed it from her ear canal and put it in her coat pocket.
... She sat in silence for a long time before releasing a sigh.
"Right. Find a husband, adopt a child... In two weeks."
She looked out the window at the couples walking the streets in the city as it moved by.
"Am I supposed to kidnap a husband? Cause right now that seems like the only realistic option."
