Dusky
Succubus
...Oops I accidentally created a total dweeb who is on the internet about as much as any of us are.
Character Critique Thread
- Thread starter welian
- Start date
DamagedGlasses
Lurking Pun Ninja
Alright, gonna need some definite say so on this guy's power. Questions about things, places where I could make it simpler, and in general, if this power would fit well. I don't think it breaks the rules, but the complexity of it has me worried, regardless. I'll be happy to invest time into making this character's power work if it's not quite there yet for the people who decide "what's what".
Fun fact: Got inspired to make this character and his power due to absently thinking about the Boy Scouts while driving.
Fun fact: Got inspired to make this character and his power due to absently thinking about the Boy Scouts while driving.
Gus
Justice RIDES AGAIN!!!
He'd make an interesting camping companion for 108 students.
You, build a fire!
You, hunt up some game!
You, find us some edible roots and herbs!
You, improvise a recipe to cook whatever they find!
You, set up the tents!
You, entertain the group with campfire songs!
I'll be over here catching 40 winks if you need me...
DamagedGlasses
Lurking Pun Ninja
He knew what skills to keep around for emergencies! Gotta get them learning the important stuff somehow. Best way? Show them what their missing, then take it away!
Gus
Justice RIDES AGAIN!!!
So sweet. And with DG's skill donator, I am inspired to make a 'conduit' version of X-men's "Rogue" (or more close to home, our own Mitch Castle) who can take powers away but can't keep them, only donate them to others.
Edited to add: Sadly all my CCPs are committed. Somebody make that happen! Make a 13 year old's dream come true!
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Necessity4Fun
I'll keep trying, even if I'm not good enough...
I just have to let you know that 'Brazilian' only means a person from Brazil, if you want to talk about the language it is 'Brazilian Portuguese' or PT-BR
Anyway, someone Juliana can ask questions to when her English knowledge starts failing? XD
Gus
Justice RIDES AGAIN!!!
Or he could just give you skill in speaking English each morning before class
Necessity4Fun
I'll keep trying, even if I'm not good enough...
Speaking English without the constant effort of asking Google stuff? Ohhhh! COUNT.HER.IN!
Does writing come in the package? Then she could make gramatically better tweets too! : O AWESOME!!!
(Nah Juli, If these count as separate skills, I don't think it works that way :
withlines: ...)
Teh Frixz
That lady robot
@Anomaly
hohohohohhhh that is perfect
@DamagedGlasses
wonkey power set and we will have to for sure see some tweaking but it's possible?
hohohohohhhh that is perfect
@DamagedGlasses
wonkey power set and we will have to for sure see some tweaking but it's possible?
Gus
Justice RIDES AGAIN!!!
DamagedGlasses
Lurking Pun Ninja
Haha, sorry about that. I added that around 6 AM in the morning, so I was definitely not all there! Thanks!
Teh Frixz
That lady robot
Reeeeeeeeeeee
Aren't you full up on CCP anyways?
But Lars as usual is slightly iffy and requires more in depth analysis. Kate on the other hand strikes me as a more classic hero type, her powers are odd but not too out there and significant weaknesses make it more palatable.
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Gus
Justice RIDES AGAIN!!!
I have enough for Kate and Lars. Then I am out.
Remember, I did ALLLLLLL the christmas prompts.
I am ok honestly if Lars forever remains NPC head-canon. He works better as a villain, but would be hard to work into a story except in an 'ostrich whisperer' type guest GM scenario. Outwitting supers as an E rank requires serious plot shenanigans beyond what is appropriate for a player to be toying with. I can just use him as prompt fodder. And maybe one day if you need a Mission or something, he can have his day in the limelight.
You like Kate though? She is my new favorite thing. Do you mean she needs MORE weaknesses or that the ones she has are appropriate?
Remember, I did ALLLLLLL the christmas prompts.
I am ok honestly if Lars forever remains NPC head-canon. He works better as a villain, but would be hard to work into a story except in an 'ostrich whisperer' type guest GM scenario. Outwitting supers as an E rank requires serious plot shenanigans beyond what is appropriate for a player to be toying with. I can just use him as prompt fodder. And maybe one day if you need a Mission or something, he can have his day in the limelight.
You like Kate though? She is my new favorite thing. Do you mean she needs MORE weaknesses or that the ones she has are appropriate?
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Teh Frixz
That lady robot
Lort
Gus
Justice RIDES AGAIN!!!
Sorry, I edited my comment and then realized you might not have seen the edit since you posted a split second before i clicked save.
Should I add even more weaknesses or is Kate good as is?
DamagedGlasses
Lurking Pun Ninja
JustNicole
Member
I need some feedback on an idea before I go through the development of character. I've got the rough idea lined up, but I need to know if I'm way off base in terms of power with the functionality of said character and feasibility. Right now, I have the character pinned as an artificial intelligence, although it could be adapted to be a paralyzed super who with some cyber enhancements who is capable of uplinking and controlling the given drones, altogether eliminating the need for an AI, although likely limiting the number of command units (below) to one.
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]I'm very interested in exploring doing a robotic AI system with no real weapons of its own that functions as a scout or infiltrator. Rather than being tied to one specific body, the AI would be able to control multiple forms at once. Essentially, it'd be a moving, scouting, perhaps somewhat capable anti-cyberwarfare suite excelling in information gathering. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]My initial thought is that the release of this system could be developed by some sort of techno genius super as a response to the attack by the knights. The specific goal of the system would be to ensure that operatives (teachers and students) were equipped with the best available information on the ground without additional risk for loss of life. For example, such a system would have been able to detect the presence of explosives in the various cars around the mall and potentially gather video + audio footage through infiltration that would be critical in attempting to foil any plots. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]Essentially, this character would be akin to the ultimate team player, a scouting AI with a lot of dry/deadpan humor.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]The AI itself would be housed remotely within Aegis’s Training Facility 108, although functioning copies of itself would reside on given command units. Command units are capable of controlling and managing their linked drones, while the central core manages the command units. Command units can operate independently of the central core until connection is reestablished. However, during that time they have limited access to previously stored data and cannot access information from other command units. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]Each individual unit can operate inside of an area where data cannot penetrate, but data cannot be accessed until a unit leaves such a place and returns to transmission radius of a command unit. Transmission range for command unit to individual units is a five-mile range. Command unit to core servers tramission relies on satellite coverage.[/SIZE]
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[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]This is a command unit, capable of controlling smaller subsets. Through the command unit, the AI can speak, and when doing so the mouth of the command unit will move like a human mouth speaking. All other drones needed for a given mission can be attached to the command unit directly and launched upon reaching the target operating area. The command unit is EMP-shielded and small to medium caliber bullet fire from the front. A single command unit can control at max two camera units (huge amounts of data, low navigational challenge), six heli units (medium data, medium navigation challenge), and four infiltrator (gnat) units (low amounts of data, high navigation challenge). [/SIZE]
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[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]The camera unit, by far the largest and most efficient information gatherer. Equipped with the latest and greatest of surveillance technology including infrared and thermal imaging, laser microphones, capable of gathering several camera angles at once all in highest definition available (16k? Unsure what the goto HD resolution would be in 2040). The maximum a single command unit can have attached or control at once is two camera units.[/SIZE]
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[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]The camera unit’s smaller brother: the heli unit. It is equipped with a single operable camera that can switch into infrared or thermal, laser microphone and standard microphone. The heli unit is used as primarily inside a building, where discretion and being incognito has higher value and the larger camera units unable to navigate easily.[/SIZE]
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[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]The infiltrator or gnat unit, armed with a single low resolution camera and decent microphone, it is designed to be a gnat on the wall in a room of a conversation. It is capable of extracting blood for analysis along with, while landed on a target, their heart rate. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]I'm very interested in exploring doing a robotic AI system with no real weapons of its own that functions as a scout or infiltrator. Rather than being tied to one specific body, the AI would be able to control multiple forms at once. Essentially, it'd be a moving, scouting, perhaps somewhat capable anti-cyberwarfare suite excelling in information gathering. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]My initial thought is that the release of this system could be developed by some sort of techno genius super as a response to the attack by the knights. The specific goal of the system would be to ensure that operatives (teachers and students) were equipped with the best available information on the ground without additional risk for loss of life. For example, such a system would have been able to detect the presence of explosives in the various cars around the mall and potentially gather video + audio footage through infiltration that would be critical in attempting to foil any plots. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]Essentially, this character would be akin to the ultimate team player, a scouting AI with a lot of dry/deadpan humor.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]The AI itself would be housed remotely within Aegis’s Training Facility 108, although functioning copies of itself would reside on given command units. Command units are capable of controlling and managing their linked drones, while the central core manages the command units. Command units can operate independently of the central core until connection is reestablished. However, during that time they have limited access to previously stored data and cannot access information from other command units. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]Each individual unit can operate inside of an area where data cannot penetrate, but data cannot be accessed until a unit leaves such a place and returns to transmission radius of a command unit. Transmission range for command unit to individual units is a five-mile range. Command unit to core servers tramission relies on satellite coverage.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]
[/SIZE]
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[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]This is a command unit, capable of controlling smaller subsets. Through the command unit, the AI can speak, and when doing so the mouth of the command unit will move like a human mouth speaking. All other drones needed for a given mission can be attached to the command unit directly and launched upon reaching the target operating area. The command unit is EMP-shielded and small to medium caliber bullet fire from the front. A single command unit can control at max two camera units (huge amounts of data, low navigational challenge), six heli units (medium data, medium navigation challenge), and four infiltrator (gnat) units (low amounts of data, high navigation challenge). [/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]
[/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]
[/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]
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[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]The camera unit, by far the largest and most efficient information gatherer. Equipped with the latest and greatest of surveillance technology including infrared and thermal imaging, laser microphones, capable of gathering several camera angles at once all in highest definition available (16k? Unsure what the goto HD resolution would be in 2040). The maximum a single command unit can have attached or control at once is two camera units.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]
[/SIZE]
Not signed in
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Not signed in
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]The camera unit’s smaller brother: the heli unit. It is equipped with a single operable camera that can switch into infrared or thermal, laser microphone and standard microphone. The heli unit is used as primarily inside a building, where discretion and being incognito has higher value and the larger camera units unable to navigate easily.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]
[/SIZE]
Not signed in
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[SIZE=14.666666666666666px]The infiltrator or gnat unit, armed with a single low resolution camera and decent microphone, it is designed to be a gnat on the wall in a room of a conversation. It is capable of extracting blood for analysis along with, while landed on a target, their heart rate. [/SIZE]
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Teh Frixz
That lady robot
I can tell you right now, I'm extremely hesitant on approving anymore AI PC's at this time. It is highly encouraged that the universe and story of AEGIS is experienced first as a student. An AI while feasible is not a role I'm willing to allow for new players at this time. In the future? Certainly. Now? It's a no go for me.
welian
#BlackLivesMatter
Yeah, everyone's first character needs to be a student as Aegis. Definitely hold on to that robot idea for later, though.
Teh Frixz
That lady robot
In addendum: I like the concept of a distributed network AI, maybe released for the purpose of monitoring specific people, and it could work well as a secondary char.
BEAT ME TO IT WELIAN
Edit EDIT: We need more students and less non staff staff. And reoccurring 'real' villains.
BEAT ME TO IT WELIAN
Edit EDIT: We need more students and less non staff staff. And reoccurring 'real' villains.
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JustNicole
Member
If said character was a paralyzed super student with cyber implants capable of interfacing directly to their own custom drones, would that work in place? I'm thinking of some extremely disabled student never capable of seeing and experiencing the word on their own, so they create a drone or drones to enable them to do so.
Teh Frixz
That lady robot
While I like the idea, again, something more conventional role wise should be your go to. I've got a character (Penny) who has a similar situation as she's leaking lethal radiation constantly. It severely limits character interaction and was done mostly as a writing challenge to myself. It's very difficult to say the least. New players should seek a character and powerset that promotes interaction with the story and other players.
JustNicole
Member
While I am looking for a way to challenge myself in terms of writing in such a manner, I understand your hesitation. Thanks for the feedback. I'll file that concept under ideas for possible later use.
Teh Frixz
That lady robot
Oh, don't worry. You'll be challenged.
JustNicole
Member
Looking for feedback on
I'm not sure what happened to the style as I copy/pasted the formatting then posted, and it came out looking like that.
I endeavored to make her a rank D, although I could have easily bumped her up to something much higher ranked. For her backstory, I added a bit of a flair/secret that should be fun to play around with. I tried to make her childhood as realistic as possible, although it might have become slightly too upbeat towards the end. I'm going to let her evolve naturally, but my initial impressions of the character are that she may end up turning away from acting for more meaningful work or finding a passion that she keeps with her. The challenge for the character will be finding ways for her to "win" given the low ability of her powers, but with her acting and diplomatic preference, I think I gave her enough tools to succeed in those situations.
I'm not sure what happened to the style as I copy/pasted the formatting then posted, and it came out looking like that.
I endeavored to make her a rank D, although I could have easily bumped her up to something much higher ranked. For her backstory, I added a bit of a flair/secret that should be fun to play around with. I tried to make her childhood as realistic as possible, although it might have become slightly too upbeat towards the end. I'm going to let her evolve naturally, but my initial impressions of the character are that she may end up turning away from acting for more meaningful work or finding a passion that she keeps with her. The challenge for the character will be finding ways for her to "win" given the low ability of her powers, but with her acting and diplomatic preference, I think I gave her enough tools to succeed in those situations.