Journal Celestine’s Dream Journal

[Celestine]

((WIP: To be coded and made pretty when I have access to my computer))

“For the moon never beams
Without bringing me dreams..”
~Edgar Allan Poe


This is where I will be recording my dreams...Only those that are really worth recording. I may have things to say about some of them. But I think most of them will just be here on their own.

 

[Celestine]

((I had this dream some time ago, but I’d written this on my phone. My boyfriend and I were separated without good means of communication. It was a sad and lonely time for me. We wrote letters, but they were slow getting to us. We were long distance from the start, but this was hard for us. This dream let me feel companionship again and got me through a tough time. I do not regularly have lucid dreams. This was the closest I’ve gotten to lucid dreaming. The only other experiences I’ve had with it were very limited, and always wore off quickly until I woke.))

WARNING: mature themes toward the end

Mother told me to step through, and I’d feel better instantly. She went first and waited on the other side. I ran the opposite way, knowing if I went through, they will have had me. I found others like me, in a failing schoolhouse. Soon the pressure was on. Go through the sleek white arch. We resisted. We were made criminals.



Our escape was the far off ghettos, which were uninhabited. They stood only as a show of just how perfect our society was...



Wandering through the ghetto alone, I realized this was a dream.



I told myself: I’m not in a horrible situation. I’m not being chased by futuristic robot police. This is a dream and I can see whatever I want. I live in this neighborhood, in fact this is the future where he and I are married and have children. I’ll walk in there and see them. This is my home here, this sort of whimsical looking place with yellow siding and ivy up the sides in sparse climbers...



I pushed on the old wooden gate of the garden fence, which only stood a couple feet off the ground. The yard at first was small, patchy. Nothing like I wanted. I closed my eyes, thinking, “When I open them, it will be transformed to the perfect yard...”



Sure enough the thing grew before my eyes, sprouting all kinds of fluffy white flowers and a couple of trees with similar blossoms. A little shed appeared to the far corner and I sensed more if I looked to the direction of the sun, which now cast a brilliant sparkle across the scene, but I did not look. I went inside through a small side door.



There were stairs. The inside was dilapidated, and as I climbed up I realized I hadn’t been home for some time. I couldn’t count my children. They weaved in and out of fallen architecture, and makeshift furniture, and random, unnecessary collections of things such as wooden platforms and tarps which made me think of the space as more of a hiding place than a home. I couldn’t really recognize them as my own. They were all thin and their skin held heavy tans. They looked at me like a stranger, chasing each other up stairs and all around me.



There was a small space on the first level which was apparently our bedroom. It looked somehow tucked beside the staircase. I saw a red blanket, and his sleeping form. He rose from his slumber to greet me lovingly. My brain focused then on making him real. I jumped into the bed to kiss him and feel him. But something bothered me. His face wasn’t quite right. He lay still while my brain put all of its power into making him exactly as I know him, though it was hard since I hadn’t been with him for so long. It took a while but eventually it was done. He looked like my lover. We both sighed in relief as we tucked ourselves in the bed. I could feel his skin. We were going to do the things lovers do. But I’d lost my power to hold on, and woke from the dream then.