Other BoltBeam's Skit Thread

[BoltBeam]

"define skit"
-a short comedy sketch or piece of humorous writing, especially a parody.

The content here is meant to be SFW, and may or may not veer from that too much, but the main focus of this is to entertain. I'm perfectly willing to get feedback on these, but I'm going to just say ahead of time, there will not be a concrete 'upload time' on these.

By reading this, you may find me putting a few of my characters in my whole cast into... interesting situations, and conversations presumably in the background. Note that any of them could appear, but like said - the aim of this is to entertain - for comedy purposes only. If you are offended, well, I'm sorry. :<

Character Thread: Here.

Links to done skits:
*Looking Like Death - 30/30/19
*When You Sleep - 4/4/19

 

[BoltBeam]

And so, skit number 1! This is honestly the one I've had the most time to think about, and I'm happy to finally put this thing to use. You bet I am.

"Looking Like Death"​

Cast: Shizuka, Kokoro, Yuri​

----​

It's a pretty bright day outside, and Shizuka has visitors over for the day. Kokoro had showed up to take a closer look at the puppets that Shizuka uses, and is greatly interested by them, and Yuri is there because... uh... Yuri's there. She looks around and sees the state of the house - let alone by the room the three are in. It's a pretty big room, and it seems to be in great condition - with all the furniture and everything spotless. Yuri, however, wasn't too worried about that. She had instead drawn her attention to Kokoro. "...Excuse me, Kokoro, but..." She began, biting her tongue for a bit as she's not sure how to put it.

"...How does it feel to have a complexion you can't change, being dead and all?" She finished, the reacting Shizuka in the background holding her breath (and a drink of water) in while the phantasmal shimmers from Kokoro changes to red and pink. "W-What kind of question is that? I never really cared about it to begin with... I don't really see the point in talking about it, seeing as I'm stuck with it..." Kokoro said shyly, Yuri rolling her eyes. "Now, now, I'm sure even the dead can look really good~..." She said, chuckling mischievously as she approaches. Kokoro wears a vacant, fearful expression as Yuri approaches, Shizuka spits out her drink in the background, standing up and stopping Yuri in her tracks.

"Yuri, this is no time for 'investigating' other people, no less the dead." She said boldly, not impressed. "You're well aware I can kick you out, right?" She added, to which Yuri looked towards her. "Aww, you're feeling left out? Don't worry, I can check you next~." Shizuka flushed up just as much as Kokoro, seeming speechless. With that done, Yuri took a closer look - and walked through Kokoro thanks to her ghostly attributes. She seemed surprised, going right through, but this gave her an idea. She tried to line up perfectly in the middle of Kokoro's phantasmal image to get a real inside look at her. "...Looking good, girl! I should stop complaining... That complexion of yours is solid, and it doesn't need changing-"

Kokoro, unable to take anymore, conjured a fireball and shoved it in Yuri's face before walking away and making that very fireball explode in her face, the force of the two combined knocking her out and potentially dazing her for the next few hours. Shizuka could not help but laugh. "Um, Kokoro? What did you just do?" She asked, confused. "I did what I wanted, and I punished the pervert." She stated back sharply. "Geez, you'd think the next step for all of this would be necrophilia or something! I'm dead and all, but surely I have human rights too!" Kokoro seemed pretty annoyed, like Yuri really ticks her off. "Not really... You're dead." Shizuka responded sadly. "...Shizuka, please..." Kokoro just groaned in anger.
----
END

 

[BoltBeam]

Had some time to burn, so I decided to make my second skit! This one's a simple one at best, but I tried to put equal amounts of interesting and comedic into it.

"When You Sleep"​

​

Cast: Yume, Scarlet, Bowe​

----
It was another bright day outside, and what better way to use it than to go and visit friends? Yume and Bowe are in Yume's place, and Scarlet had decided to go and visit the two. Upon entering, she was treated to the sight of Bowe sleeping in Yume's arms, the latter of which gently stroking Bowe's head as if to ease her into this slumber. Scarlet cleared her throat and Yume looked up. "Oh? Good morning, Scarlet. What has brought you to me?" She asked curiously, understandably confused. "Well, Yume, if I'm honest, I've kind of got a few questions about you, to you." Scarlet said honestly, trying to think how to word them.

"Being a previous dream ruler and all, what exactly happens when people sleep? Or when 'you' sleep, for that matter?" Scarlet asked. Yume thought about it. "That's an interesting question... If I had to give you the short version, the dreamer's thoughts while they sleep give birth to dreams, and they themselves are transported into this dream world they envision, with their thoughts intact. They can be whatever they want in the dream world, and I was given similar treatment - though I was not born of my own free will." Scarlet tried to take all that in. "That's the short version?!" She exclaimed, which woke up the sleeping Bowe, who yelped, saw Scarlet and cried out of fear.

"There, there..." Yume said softly to Bowe. "You'll be OK..." She said as Bowe hugged her some more. "Reaper scares me... Bowe don't wanna die! Bowe wanna be with friends and do what friends do!" Bowe said, with fear in her eyes. Judging from her bond with Yume, that would probably mean joining her in her naps. Scarlet laughed. "OK, if you want to sleep so badly, I can grant that liberty - for a life time, if you will! ...With permission from my dad, that is, and your own will." She said. "Your dad?" Bowe asked. "Your dad who?" She added. "Well, not 'biological' dad, rather adoptive. The Grim Reaper himself." Scarlet responded confidently.

"Hold on, so by 'sleeping for a life time' you mean... Killing us...?" Yume asked, noticeably triggered. "Why would we want to sleep for such a long time...? Sleep is only to rest the body, no more, no less. It's hard to explain it to someone who doesn't rest at all, though..." Yume said coldly. Scarlet covered her mouth a second and soon retorted. "Hey, death never sleeps because he's always counting your remaining seconds-!" She was them pulled into Yume's arms and shut right up out of surprise. Yume chuckled when she pulled Scarlet in, Bowe included. "Now you can... Sleep nicely with us." Yume said softly. Scarlet let out a muffled groan before speaking. "I can't believe you've done this..." She said as she fell asleep in no time.
----
END

 

[Anshelical]

I'm dead and all, but surely I have human rights too!"

Haha! What would this world do about people who's already dead?

 

[BoltBeam]

Haha! What would this world do about people who's already dead?

Um... I actually don't know. How does one deal with a ghost, which are heavily rumoured to not exist in our world?

I mean, in context, she's taking shape of a human, so by that sense, she's technically a ghost human, and thus thinks she'd logically have human rights and all that.