A Fantasy Group Setting?

[Terra]

Mofrora: Prologue


The Frozen South: the name given to the stark and unforgiving frontier that lies beyond the High Moor of Aceutror. A bleak wilderness where barbarian clans and tribes of giants roam the land and fierce dragons whom rule the skies. But amidst the frozen savagery stands a bastion of civilization : the city of Mofrora. Behind the city's walls those whom are both hardy and brave carve out a harsh existence from this bleak land under the guidance and protection of Lord Halaster Alidor, whom unbeknownst to the denizens is an elder dragon.


However, there are some things that all the courage, and power in the world cannot stand against. A virulent plague fell upon the city, a terrible affliction that began in the Maggot's Nest, home to the most dangerous criminals of Aceutror. Soon all of Mofrora would feel the icy touch of this devastating plague.


The disease could not be cured. Panic ensued, the streets erupted into riots, from many wishing to escape the plague ridden city, those of noble descent, sealed their district away hoping to keep out the plague, abandoning all of those pleading for help, refusing to turn over their food, water, or medicine. The city of Mofrora was brought to its knees.


To save Mofrora, Halaster Alidor, Lord of Mofrora, put forth a call for a group of champions. A rush of so called heroes answered his call: some drawn by promises of fame and glory, others by the allure of gold. Those showing the greatest potential were initiated into the Academy to train and study under the greatest minds of Mofrora, all in the hopes heroes might emerge to save the city from the devastating might of the plague... and whatever sinister force might be behind it.


--------------------


Right well the point of this thread, is to get any opinions and advice that you might can think of to help improve upon this, make changes that could be nice. I've got some things figured out, but the minds of many, is a lot better than the mind of one.

 

[Blumenkranz]

Seems well written for an intro, but it definitely needs more meat if you want it to be a full blown setting.


First of all, if the RP is going to take place inside Mofrora, you are going to need to flesh it out more extensively if you want to seduce me. For example, how is the city? Right now, I am just getting a generic medieval city vibe (narrow streets, two to three floor buildings and a big castle in the middle), which is not a bad thing, but this is a fantasy setting so we might as well go all the way in. Does Mofrora have any flamboyant structures, like obscenely high towers, giant magic reactors or other out-of-place buildings that would look very odd in our universe or even be physically impossible? Is it placed on top of some unusual geography, like a volcano or a small sea? How is the architecture? How are its people? How is the culture?


Then, what's exactly the plague? Is it just a renamed bubonic plague or is there more to it? The fact that the king is trying to make an elite force to fight it makes me think it turns people into zombies or something. I mean, usually you wouldn't expect adventurers to research the cure to a disease, only scientists or healers, but it seems it is implied they are warriors.